I consider myself to be a self aware, enlightened being on the planet, having a treasure trove of wisdom and compassion and all that good stuff…but there are times I seem to get caught with my emotional pants down…meaning I get hit hard with all these feelings that seem to come out of nowhere! I’ll be having a perfectly nice morning, sipping my Dunkin Donuts coffee…the sky is blue; all is well on earth and in heaven and “bam” sadness rains on my parade.
WE’ve all been well trained in pushing these little morsels away…who wants to FEEL for god’s sake? especially stuff we judge as ‘bad’? or ikky? Well, guess what? they don’t go away until ya feel them. Yep that’s right. that’s the secret! So what I’ve learned to do is, let those little rascals in, I’l cry and cry, feels like my heart is being ripped apart, and like life as I know it is over, and I’ll be consumed in this feeling forever!
So, I breathe, taking some deep belly breaths, then I give a great big hug to that lost little girl inside…maybe remembering some sweet moments from childhood….so what’s happening is I’m not judging the feeling, or trying to analyze the hell out of it….and, almost magically, it dissolves into a feeling of peace. And who doesn’t like feelings of peace? But we can’t get there unless we are courageous enough to feel. And if we don’t feel we end up having a crisis to make us feel…so we might as well cut out the middle man.
Sometimes the sadness is mine, thinking of people I’ve lost, sometimes it’s from the world or other people…sometimes it feels like I’m losing myself…so, I invite it in, come with me little one, we’re going home together.