Some Body To Love

Dear Body,

Hello.  I want you to know, from the deepest part of me, to the deepest part of you, I am sorry.  I haven’t been the best friend to you over the years.  My love toward you has been rather conditional.  When you felt good and looked good I could more easily love you.

 Not so much when you got sick, or hurt, or when you began showing your age!  There were so many times I worried about you, and went into gloom and doom, expecting the worst.  I didn’t realize that doing that only made things worse, that you were simply responding to my emotions.  Now I can see that you were always doing your best.  You were a loyal friend, even when I was not.  When I think of all the times I berated you, was ashamed of you, angry and disappointed in you.  Boy, if I was in a relationship with someone and he or she did that to me, I would kick their ass out the door!!!

In my defense, I really wasn’t as aware and awake as I am now.  Now I get that you are responsive to my emotions generated by my beliefs.  But you know that.  You also know that you are the product of a long line of inherited attributes.  In a way, I’m just borrowing you.  You are not yet a true expression of my newly developing Christ Consciousness.  But, dear, dear body.  Does that give me the right to berate you?  To be so abusive to you at times?

Now, by the grace of the new Christ Consciousness, you are transforming.  You know that every one of your cells has been activated.  You are becoming more and more light body.  And now I know that all the symptoms, the illnesses and diseases are part of the process, and that I serve you best by just allowing those energies to transmute and be released.  I want to be with you more, and not somewhere far away, in my mind, where it was safer to be.  Or so I believed.

I hated you when you gained all that weight.  But now I know you did it to ground the intense crystalline energies.  Now that they are stabilizing, you have shed the weight.  It still fluctuates from time to time, and now I am o.k. with it.  And the fatigue.  It comes and goes, but the chronic, daily fatigue is gone now.  You seem to know what you are doing when I step out of the way!

Something is happening.  You are getting healthier.  You still have some stuck energies, or maybe that’s my interpretation of what’s going on.  I’m learning to trust this process.  I see how you have your own wisdom.  You know when to eat, and what to eat.  When to rest and when to walk.

I have begun to appreciate you.  And to see your beauty.  You have been a loyal friend to me all these years.  You were doing your best considering your genes and the gloom and doom you had to deal with from my mind.

So on this day, dear body, I honor you.  I respect you as I never have before.   Thank you for your loyal service to me.  I look forward to us transforming together into a true expression of spirit.

copyright © 2015, Maria Chambers, All rights reserved. Please feel free to share this content with others, post on your blog, your Facebook page, etc, but maintain this article’s integrity by including the author and source website link: Maria Chambers at


70 thoughts on “Some Body To Love

  1. Elila

    I just read this out loud to my own dear body, and gave it a big hug!
    Thank you for so beautifully articulating what ive been feeling (again). 😊💕💙💕

  2. Elila

    Maria may i ask about how long that excess weight stuck around for you? And perhaps what it felt/looked like when it began to release? Were there any signs, in retrospect, that it was turning around?

    1. Elila,
      Of course everyone is different and there are many factors involved, but for me the extra weight started coming off in a significant way about a year ago. However there are fluctuations of weight gain/loss. But overall I seem to be getting back to a weight that I am comfortable with. It was slow and almost imperceptible. But over time it was noticed by my clothes fitting looser. All my life I was very skinny, and could eat anything and not gain an ounce. Then, in the early 90’s, when I believe my personal l. B. Process began, I started putting on weight. Within about a year I went from 100 lbs. To 180 lbs. No one recognized me. Not that 180 is tremendous weight, but for someone who was called stringbean all her life it was quite a shock But the weight dropped off to closer to 150. I am 5’6″ “. I think that was fine for me, but it went up and down periodically.
      I noticed when I got my mind off it, it would become more balanced. Not easy of course in a culture of barbie doll standards paraded in front of us continually.
      I sense that as we integrate our light body, we will not need the extra weight anymore. And that is also because we will feel fulfilled by spirit. Hope this helped.

      1. Elila,
        Something else came to mind…an interesting phenomenon…while in certain relationships I would put on extra weight, especially around the stomach area…cortisol? and then when the relationship ended…off came that extra weight…we tend to, especially us women, take on others’ energies.

  3. Elila

    Maria thanks so much for sharing this. The weight thing has been so confusing for me, especially since ive had a very healthy, balanced, diet & lifestyle for years now, which was consequently initiated by the first round of weight gain when this process began for me, around the late 90’s. I too had always been slender. Around the time the process began i also met my (now ex) husband, and for the first time in my life balooned up to about 180–i blamed it on all the wining and dining he did to woo me! It took me about 3 years of intense dieting & exercise regimens to get it off, & when i finally did i felt amazing. And i stuck with the healthy changes i had made to get there–or i THOUGHT the things that had gotten me there. Now i wonder if all that diet & exercise had anything to do with it! A couple years after the weight came off, i got divorced and the weight came back–wih a vengeance–this time to up over 200lbs. That took me another 4yrs of struggle to release. Once THAT came off, i REALLY felt amazing, and was back living in florida. I felt so good i ended up adopting a raw vegan lifestyle, with daily exercise on the beach walking & riding my bike (i dont own a car). It was effortless for me to maintain this new way & i felt the best i ever have. I truly believed id never ever have to be overweight again with these new habits. Then. Then i came up north for a 4 week trip that turned into me needing to be here indefinitely. The weight came on so fast my head spun, but this time only about thirty pounds, but still enough to make it very uncomfortable in this body–more difficult to move around, too much weight presure on knees & ankles etc. Not to mention the emotional aspect of having felt & looked my best ever to now not even close! So its been so many years of struggle with this, and for many of them i was not even aware of what the ascension process was. I share this all in case anyone else sees this and perhaps relaxes a little knowing they are not alone–because it doesnt seem like thos is getting talked about a lot, but it DOES seem that a LOT of us are trying to deal with it?
    Anyhow i really appreciate you sharing your experience–it sure does help!
    PS–also, it never seemed to me to be about the food (or the exercise for that matter). At times i could be eating my way through some of the finest restaurants in the country & not gain an ounce, other times i could be dieting strictly & running several miles a day & working out with a (brutal!) personal trainer 3-4 times a week for over a year & unable to LOSE an ounce!

    1. Elila
      That’s uncanny…both of us in the 90’s…with new partners…(I too met my now ex husband)…and at the time I also had no clue it was about the ascension process…looking back now it makes sense. and yes, I initially tried the dieting and exercise, but I also discovered that, besides the ascension process, our consciousness, our beliefs had a lot to do with the way our body responded….believing so intensely that we were overweight, or sick, etc…if that was our dominant vibration, that’s how our body would respond. So if we were taking action (dieting and exercising ) because we BELIEVED we were overweight, THAT belief perpetuated the problem.

      And in this new consciousness, as we begin to love and accept ourselves as we are, THAT in turn transforms our issues without struggle and pain….At least that is what I am learning through this process. But our bodies are the last to catch up with our new consciousness…and I know we are sick of hearing that, but I can say that I have ‘recovered’ from some so called incurable illnesses, without my mind trying to figure it out. One was chronic fatigue. Another was IBS. It seemed they both just went away gradually on their own.

      Thanks for sharing your experiences too.

      1. Elila

        Wow that is uncanny! And hmm i never thought of it from that particular angle, about “overweight” being the dominant vibration. But i have noticed that the more fun im having, the happier i am, or if im really inspired by something, weight comes off much easier. However, the situation this process has me in has me a bit painted into a corner, especially financially, and finding something to get happy or inspired about is pretty challenging 😜 sometimes! But it could be a lot worse of course. And i too have had a few “incurables” that would supposedly require lifetime medication resolve themselves, like hypothyroidism, severe clinical depression, and a digestive/bowel condition not entirely unlike IBS. So ive not required any meds for several years now. Theres a few more “conditions” standing in line for resolution, As well as the weight, but more and more i feel like my body can sort it all out on its own without my interference. Conversations like this help more than i can say!

        1. Elila
          I like your expression ‘painted into a corner’ because that is how so many feel with this transformational process. Whether it’s financially, emotionally, health-wise….and that is exactly what we needed in order to give up control and allow spirit, our soul-self to come in closer and be with us, and create all the energies necessary to resolve each and everyone of these issues. And really it’s our mind that obsesses on the issues, and rightly so. It’s our mind that believes it must protect us. It’s interesting how health issues in my own life have initiated this deep desire to connect with my soul like never before!
          And thank you also for sharing your healings of your personal physical and emotional issues. (Yes, and depression was another one that lifted for me, too!). We need to remind ourselves of what we have accomplished. Blessings.💗💗💗

    2. Kat

      “And i too have had a few “incurables” that would supposedly require lifetime medication resolve themselves, like hypothyroidism, severe clinical depression, and a digestive/bowel condition not entirely unlike IBS”
      Hi Elila,

      I, too, had problems with my tyroid from age 13 and for the past 12 (until 2013) or so years I changed from taking iodine to thyroxine to keep the hormonal situation in my thyroid in check. A couple of years ago, before getting a new pack of thyroxine my then doctor insisted to do a blood test before, to figure out if I need to change the medication (get a stronger or lighter type). The test revealed that I in fact have too my thyroxine now and that my thyroide is over active. So I stopped taking the medication. She told me to do another test a month later which showed better results, but still some overactivity. She told me to visit a radiologist to get some radioactive stuff injected in order to see what parts of the thyroid are not in balance to be able to treat it better. But instinctively I knew that my body will sort this out on its own. I didn’t really feel comfortable with this doctor anway and changed my GP. I knew that the thyroid will of course need some time to balance out on its own, one month is nowhere near enough to do that.
      So one year later I asked for a blood test with my new doctor and she revealed that my thyroid results are absolutely fine, there were no problems there at all and they haven’t been since that day.
      The same with depression. I think depression is a huge part of the ascension process and I still wonder whether other people, who have the symptoms of depression, are in fact ascending?
      Maybe the difference is that spirtual depression, that we experience, always came with an underlying feeling that it makes sense to feel that way. That we are slowly shedding old skin, like a snake, and that will of course feel scary and uncomfortable, sometimes numbing. I had the whole range of symptoms of severe depression: hoplessness, panic attacks (every day), anxiety, feeling numb, feeling sad, you name it, but the knowing, that this will not last forever, and that it will be worth it in the end was there the whole time. Thank God that I didn’t know that it’ll last way over a decade haha.
      It’s always great to read your experiences and see how much us ascension forerunners have in common.
      Much Love

      1. Elila

        Maria & Kat,
        Wow im so glad i opened my mouth & asked more on this subject! Obviously i wouldn’t wish what we’ve been through on any of us but oh how comforting i find it to read the astonishing similarities in our experiences! And boy oh boy i have thought countless times that its a darn good thing no one told me how long this process would drag on 😳😳😳
        The depression for me was nearly life long, ranging from a mild dread of life to constant thoughts of wanting to just not be here. I still have thoughts and feelings like that but its on an entirely different level & not paralyzing anymore. I spent years on prozac & other meds just because it was the only way i could keep going. I hated having to take pills but they did keep me alive, and now im grateful every day to not need them anymore. Even painted into this tight little corner in all the ways you mention Maria, i STILL feel better, more positive & hopeful& confident than i ever did with the meds! You are SO right that we need to remember how far we have come already, and also Kat i think you are right that we need to keep reminding ourselves (even if we feel it inately deep down) that it wont last forever.
        I cant tell you beautiful ladies how grateful i am to be sharing this journey with you, to have you to talk with about these challenges. It makes the path so much brighter!! Love to you,
        Elila 💕😊💕

      2. Kat

        Dear Elila

        “I cant tell you beautiful ladies how grateful i am to be sharing this journey with you, to have you to talk with about these challenges. It makes the path so much brighter!! Love to you,”

        The absolutely same to you and Maria! You can’t imagine how grateful I am to have found this blog and to be able to talk about stuff and exchange our very similar thoughts and experiences. It is so comforting to know that I am not the only weirdo in the world, and that there are at least 2 other weirdos that understand 😉
        And yeah, I did have that feeling of wanting to go home lately, a feeling of some old stuff leaving me, which made me feel sad, and I really think that the heavy feelings should be gone by now (what would do I know lol).

  4. Elila

    Also i definitely have noticed that relationships with certain people absolutely have an effect on my weight (yep im talking to you mother & ex husband LOL)!

  5. Kat

    Dear Maria,

    another great – and very needed – piece. Thank you for that.
    Of course, as usual with your articles, it came in absolutely perfect timing, because I, too have been working on getting in shape and shedding some weight.
    I am not that overweight really, but I wouldn’t feel comfortable walking around in a skirt now. I want to feel comfortable doing that, so I started to work out a bit and watch what I eat.
    Interestingly my body seems to be as rebellious as the rest of me so I figured out that even the smallest limitations have the contrary effect. If I even give the slightest restriction (for example on my all time favourite chocolate) my body will crave massive amounts of chocolate as a reaction to that limitation. Note, that I don’t forbid myself to eat chocolate at all, but even when I think that I should eat less my body reacts in the complete opposite way. The same with running. When I go out in my running gear with the intention to just have a walk, I can guarantee I will be running all the way to the park, around it and back. When I go out with the intention to give my all and run all the way through, my body will suddenly not want to run at all and I won’t have the will and lust for running like the day when I only wanted to walk. Does that makes sense? lol
    So I guess it is similar to our mental and emotional situation: there is no sense in restricting our thoughts and emotions and putting on limitations, that does have the contrary effect. Maybe in giving our bodies the freedom it needs it will balance itself out on its own?
    Much Love,

    1. Elila

      Well Kat it makes PERFECT sense to ME–as i am experiencing the exact same thing! I cant run unless its an urge bubbling up from inside me where i cant NOT run. No amount of good intention or will power will get it to happen! And even a WHIFF of restriction will backfire tenfold on me! Even if i try to have one less potato for supper i will wind up ravenously snacking at midnight. No one looking at me would believe that my diet is almost all fruit & veg but its true. I’m overweight and i walk 11 miles every day & eat mostly produce–go figure! And i cant wear a skirt either (ugh thigh rub) much less a bikini. But somehow it does feel like the body knows what its doing, & is adamant about me not interfering with its process! It just doesnt feel like restriction or struggle is the way to get anywhere any more–& i like how you broadened that idea to encompass our mental & emotional state too–i hadnt thought of that but of course it makes sense!
      Love back,

      1. Kat

        Elila, exactly this ” I cant run unless its an urge bubbling up from inside me where i cant NOT run” has happened to me today.
        The weather was quite bad, it was grey, coldish and raining outside but I wanted to go outside just to walk to the park and as soon as I went out I started running and I felt really really good. There is no way I can force myself to do sth. anymore, it just won’t happen and I actually never really responded well to force, from the inside, or the outside, being the stubborn person that I am haha.
        I answered to another comment of yours above if you haven’t seen it yet (about illnesses).
        Anyway, I hope you are keeping well and this process is not draining you too much.
        Another typical (but annoying) thing has been happening with my job situation. To cut it short, I m again in that situation where I have to wait really really long for the potential employer to answer me (and this time the chances to get that job are/were actually very high), so I keep wondering why God, the universe, the ascension process or whoever doesn’t want me to work ? I see no sense in it, because I can’t wait to start working again actually.
        much LOVE,

  6. Elila

    Im honored to be one of your other 2 weirdos! It looks to me that i am in terrific company 😊 & i appreciate this lovely little group more than i can express.
    I have also been having intense “home sick” feelings on & off lately–just really really wanting to go home, to a place that FEELS like home, & not knowing where that is. And you are right about another thing–it most certainly DOES seem that i have been resolutely BLOCKED from working since 2009. Im not sure where these energies are leading us, but i feel quite sure it wont look anything like our old “hard work & willpower” lives. It just shouldnt have to be so hard to be here. I think struggle is on the way out & we will be manifesting in much more pleasant and easy ways, & work wont feel like work anymore–AND–we will be doing stuf because it thrills us, not because we need a paycheck. So much of the slowness of this process feels like im being almost imperceptably conditioned in that direction, & that it’s taking so long number one so it sticks & is solid, and number two so its not too terribly jarring? And yes i sure wish the heavy feelings and bodies would have lightened up by now, but hey, ive trusted & waited this long, been through SO much in this radical transformation, well its not like i can give up now even if i wanted to! And so much has changed that it cant possibly all be for nothing either–this is CLEARLY going somewhere & frankly id like to see just how much life could delight me. Id really like to experience a sincere love & excitement for life! I’ll just have to keep on trusting & walking along with Team Weirdo!!! 💚💕💚

    1. Kat

      The amount of similarities in our ap (ascension process) is really spooky. Since 2009 there has been nothing but struggle to find a job for me, too. I did work throughout 2011, but even there I had nothing to do really and was bored out of my head, which was almost worse than being unemployed. I also have the exact same feeling as you here

      “Im not sure where these energies are leading us, but i feel quite sure it wont look anything like our old “hard work & willpower” lives. It just shouldnt have to be so hard to be here. I think struggle is on the way out & we will be manifesting in much more pleasant and easy ways, & work wont feel like work anymore–AND–we will be doing stuf because it thrills us, not because we need a paycheck.”

      I am sure that’s the way it will be, but I feel this waiting period – until that new quality completely unfolds and we live what we feel should be the right way to live – can be tough. Especially on people that are used to getting things done quickly and are not the patient type.

      “And yes i sure wish the heavy feelings and bodies would have lightened up by now, but hey, ive trusted & waited this long, been through SO much in this radical transformation, well its not like i can give up now even if i wanted to! And so much has changed that it cant possibly all be for nothing either–this is CLEARLY going somewhere & frankly id like to see just how much life could delight me. Id really like to experience a sincere love & excitement for life! I’ll just have to keep on trusting & walking along with Team Weirdo!!! ”

      Yes, yes and yes! It is definitely gping somewhere and I know for sure it is. The curiosity is just too high for me in order to give up on it. Giving up is not an option anyway; I believe as long as we are here we are in this process, period. Giving up would mean taking our own lives and that is not an option.

    1. Kat

      Haha yeah 😀
      I’ve been called a weirdo by numerous people throughout my life and I have always taken it as a compliment. It means that I am not a follower, that I am doing my own thing and the fact other people found that weird was a sign that I am doing it right 😀

    2. Elila

      So true!!!! I may be in a minority, but to me it looks like all those sleepers who are still deeply entrenched in the “hard work” paradigm are the ones who are grossly misinformed. I mean, playing a game you hate and that makes you miserable and sick because some bully long ago said THIS is the game we are gonna play–well that seems pretty weird to me!!!! And yep–now i always think if “everyone” seems to be doing it then its probably wrong for me!
      Also Kat, im also one of the efficient and impatient that seems to always be waiting for others to catch up, and always frustrated by silly delays–& i get the sense that the reason is because wherever it is we came from, things were MUCH easier for us to manifest, things were so much clearer & less complicated, & our cells & spirit remember that, which makes it super frustrating to be slogging along in slo-mo 3D land for sure! Its like at “home” we are birds but here we are snails lol🐌🐌🐌
      Thats just how it feels to me!

      1. Kat

        “And yep–now i always think if “everyone” seems to be doing it then its probably wrong for me!”

        Haha yeah, me too!!! I have always had an aversion against something if everyone else did it or thought it was great. It might just be the good old rebel spirit in me, or maybe I just sensed that the vast majority is just sheep who follow what the rest is doing and their hearts are not really in it.

        “that seems to always be waiting for others to catch up, and always frustrated by silly delays”

        Yes, Yes, Yes!! I am always the fast one, not only with doing stuff, but also with feeling and sensing changes. Had it in school, in 1st grade, where I was the only child that could read already at the start of school. I taught myself in kindergarden lol. Knew all the capitals of the world and could calculate as well a bit so it was really annoying to have to wait for everyone else to catch up. Not just academically but generally as you say.

        “i get the sense that the reason is because wherever it is we came from, things were MUCH easier for us to manifest, things were so much clearer & less complicated, & our cells & spirit remember that”

        It makes sense, never thought about it that way.

  7. Elila

    PS. I should also note that i have never been one who was much interested in work or career. It seemed a mystery to me and i struggled my whole life diligently forcing myself to do all sorts of things i hated for the paycheck, and to get people “off my back” or gain their approval. To survive and fit in. But i have never found that thing, that purpose, that i cant NOT do, or even anything i dont MIND doing for money (for some reason doing even something i originally enjoyed for money, making it obligatory, completely ruined it for me & id end up loathing it). Every attempt at making money has been a disaster for me. And then it became impossible somehow! And i slowly lost steam with all the trying hard, and now a sort of surrender/apathy has set in & im curious to see where all this is leading!

    1. Kat

      ” But i have never found that thing, that purpose, that i cant NOT do, or even anything i dont MIND doing for money (for some reason doing even something i originally enjoyed for money, making it obligatory, completely ruined it for me & id end up loathing it).”

      I haven’t found that either. I know I am a good story teller, I am creative, I have a very visual way of thinking and good imagination, but neither of this is on my radar right now meaning, I don’t feel like writing stories and making them into films at all now, not even as a hobby.
      And I completely understand what you say about starting to loathe sth. when it becomes obligatory.
      The things is though, that I am 34 years old and I cant imagine not working at all anymore unless I of course win the lottery, which I play every now and then. But why, if work clearly isn’t for me as experience has shown me over and over again, don’t I win the jackpot ? haha 😀 but I really do wonder why not, you know.
      I feel like, I can’t be doing all this bloody hard spiritual work all this time and at the same time having to live off social benefits? I don’t think so. I find that unfair.

      1. It’s like we are rebooting our computer and moving into a much faster, more effecient processor, but meanwhile we have to ‘unplug’, disconnect for awhile. And the new processor will not include any old programs that make the computer run sluggishly… Such as fear, lack of self worth, guilt, shame, etc…can’t clog up our hard drive with those….and right, in the non physical we could manifest instantly, whereas here on the earth, we have the time lag, and it gave us the opportunity to see mirrored outside of us what was happening within us. How our vibration of lack was manifesting in real time. We came here to work out in a real, physical way our inner issues, because we did have unresolved issues even in non physical. Our divinity gave us the gift of free will and sent us out to play and discover ourselves. Now our divinity is coming back to us, here in these physical bodies, to share its unconditional love and to create for us our hearts desires… And yep, it does require us to give up control, to become rebooted, so we can invite who we also are into our lives. Nope, not for the weak of heart! As we all know intimately!!!💕💕

  8. Elila

    Gah! Maria i have used that same metaphor of rebooting to make sense of it!! Its like downloading a new improved operating system & having to shut down/go offline to do it, and when it comes back up there are always bugs to work out initially LOL.
    And Kat i dont think we will end up on the dole at all! I think that we will have some new perspective that we havent discovered yet, that the concept of work will be different, that we will more easily attract resources simply by doing things we enjoy. I dont have a clear picture of what it will be like, but these are a few things i sense could happen. That my attitude toward “work” could change completely! Who knows? Im open to and curious about how all this will play out!

    1. Kat

      Yeah I think that, too. I wouldn’t have anything against winning the lottery either though haha.
      And I have been on the dole for a while now (I don’t live in the US though so I can live off it rather ok-ish)

      1. Elila

        Ha Lady im all for winning the lottery LOL! Think of that compensation as the route the universe is using to keep you going until we come back online with our spectacular new operating system that will remedy all the bugs that have slowed us down so far!
        This process may be long-lived, but its still TEMPORARY!

  9. Suzanne

    This is a great article. I have had chronic fatigue and bowel problems on and off sice 2009. Both are going away of their own accord. The tiredness has been bad lately but I think many people have been feeling this during February.

    Wish I could say the weight has gone though. Accepting it and loving my body as it is feels like a major step towards really healing. Thank you for sharing your insights.

    1. Suzanne, yes, those physical issues went away for me also, yet some other issues are persistent. And of course the physical body is always the last part of us to ‘catch up’ with our consciousness. Also, I agree, the recent fatigue seems to be felt by many of us. Things seem much more ‘intense’ out there, and it takes some patience with ourselves not to get swept up in it.
      Thank you for sharing your experiences. It’s important for us to remind ourselves and each other that we ARE making headway, and there are ‘success’ stories….of healing and recovery and all because we are allowing more joy into our lives. 💕

      1. Suzanne

        The solar winds etc of February bouhgt in some intense energies – lots of insights and inner growth but, as you say, the body is working hard to keep up. I am finding I get tired indoors but feel fine in nature a lot recently.

        1. Oh, thanks for that confirmation about the energies of February…it did seem like I tired more easily…and right, being in nature does make a difference. When I’m tired I tend to stay indoors, yet being outside would benefit me. I am fortunate to have a beautiful nature preserve right here in my back yard. The apt. complex backs up to it. But sometimes I don’t even want to see anyone, run into a neighbor etc. But I sometimes just walk barefoot on the grass and it feels great.🐢🐸🌴

          1. Suzanne

            I have been feeling like not seeing people a lot. Just the past two days I am finally feeling that energy begin to shift. I find people can really wear me out though. I have gotten really sensitive too other people’s energy.

  10. Elila

    Maria & Suzanne,

    Chiming a hearty “me too!” here! I am super sensitive to solar/geomagnetic intensity too, and it has been really heavy. And i walk in nature every day to dissipate the blasts & all the muck they roil up–but ugh so hard sometimes running into people! (I saw a t-shirt recently that said
    “I dont hate people, i just feel better when they are not around”
    😄😄😄). I also become fatigued around people quite often. Getting myself outdoors & moving my body seems to be my salvation lately–im a much more pleasant person for it LOL 😜
    Love & energizing hugs,
    Elila 💚💙💚

    1. Yeah, Elila, and as much as I love frequenting the çafe, I really prefer to sit alone. With some people I can more easily say, “I need my space” but others it’s harder because of our history of being in a group there. But it seems I have less and less to say to them, especially if they are not interested in self love. I notic also, as a woman, that men want to spend time at my table, now of course older men….they often misinterpret my friendliness for flirting. Even as I try to be more ‘reserved’ they still sense I am different, not shut down. Because as I look around, most women are still very shut down. Very protective of themselves. And understandably.

      1. Elila

        Yep i’m the same way Maria. I prefer my own company to to just about any others. And i also seem to be popular with the older men-its odd! I dont get the sense that they are really any more open and awake than so many of the women who are shut down (understandably for SURE)–i think they just sense some sort of different vibe from me that other women dont display–like im not trying to get their attention at all & would actually prefer they leave me alone a lot of the time (which as we all know is catnip to men lol), i dont dress to get male attention, im not insecure or flirty or ‘checking them out’–which seems to really intrigue them, but most of all i think its that they can tell on some level that i dont NEED them. (A few years ago a female friend told me “You are the only person i know who doesnt need anything from me!”, and that felt important at the time. Now i see how it confounds people & its interesting!) I had a conversation with a male friend this weekend & i said do you know how crazy most people think i am for putting my SELF first? My own emotional & physical well being & health? And then tell them im not interested in dating either?! Oh lord! And he agreed most people find that stance quirky at best & we laughed because it makes perfect sense to us!
        Also friends sometimes want to walk with me & i have had to find gentle ways to say i really need/prefer to walk alone. 😊

        1. Elila,
          Your comments made me laugh out loud….because it’s so true! The thing about some men wanting what they think they can’t have. Classic! I’ve been accused of “seduction and abandonment’ and I thought that was interesting. For awhile I thought, well maybe I’d better be more reserved, but then I said, screw that! I’m not going to stop being myself to make someone else more comfortable. Like you describe, I am not trying to get anyone’s attention either, I’m just very comfortable with myself, by myself! I guess we are a ‘new breed,’ and our slogan can be, “We’re here, we’re CLEAR, get over it!!” And yes, in a world that sees a woman who is not dating as ‘in between’ lovers, or boyfriends or husbands, and not seeing that she is consciously choosing being alone as a lifestyle, we are the anomalies. (BTW this subject is in my soon to be published post that is sitting in my wordpress queue.)

      2. Kat

        Maria and Elila,

        me too! 😀
        While here in Germany the pressure to be part of the dating game is probably not as high as in the US, I was still deemed as “abnormal” or again as a weirdo for not wanting to take part in it and feeling comfortable all by myself. I am currently in my first relationship ever (since last year), which is of course unusual at 34, with a guy who lives a couple of hundred kilometres away and who I only see once in a month for a couple of days. And it is great! I still have my freedom, but also enjoy his company when he comes visit me.
        I never wanted to be in a relationship before (and this one just developed spontaneously without even planning or trying), because I never felt incomplete and just being with someone, becaue everyone else has a bf seemed stupid to me. I did feel I have some issues that prevent me from letting someone physically and emotionally close to me, and I knew I wanted to work through them, but I’ve always found the thought of needing someone in order to be “complete” very constricting and unhealthy.
        Like you two, I also love to sit alone in cafes or go for walks all on my own, trying to avoid having to talk to people, lol

        1. Kat,
          It sounds like you have a nice balance and are enjoying the sharing in a relationship as opposed to the extracting from the other that seems so much the norm in old energy relationships. And the fact that you waited to have a relationship is a sign you understood the importance of first having the relationship with yourself. Wow, wonderful! And it’s nice to hear from other women that they are wanting to just be themselves which includes just sitting alone at the cafe for instance. Maybe we can wear a t shirt that reads, ‘No, people, we are not freaks, or avoiding intimacy, we really DO enjoy our own company!!’😊

  11. Elila

    Yes!! Because who on earth would actually CHOOSE to be single???!!!? LOL 😆 I saw a Maxine cartoon not long ago that read,
    “A man without a woman is called a ‘bachelor’. A woman without a man is called…..
    A GENIUS.”
    And heavens yes–being accused of “teasing” just because i am very comfortable speaking with men (because im comfortable with mySELF & not manipulating for anything or playing any angle) & friendly; its funny how what used to be called confident and polite is now “seduction”??? Good grief! When i was living in miami-dade & palm beach counties, the women there were HYPER predatory & competetive (understandable in a place where every woman over 40 has been dumped for a 25yr old), so against that background i REALLY stood out. And when i would politely decline advances, men were incredulous! (Understandably so in a place where any 70yr old man with a designer wallet can have a cute 25yr old 🙄).
    And i thought the same as you, that i’d better be more reserved or even closed off, but again i had the very same thought as you–why should i change to compensate for others insecurities? So i LOVE your slogan idea, and i cant WAIT to read that post!!!

    PS. Just for the record i wasnt always this strong, confident, and comfortable with myself. I was hoping for prince charming with all the other gals going on auditions (or “dates”, as the vernacular calls them). But not long after A.P. began, well you know everything changes & the inessentials all begin to fall away….. 😉, and it felt less & less important for me to be partnered.

    1. I love your descriptions…and, right there with you…many of us took a path that had us shedding all the old paradigm beliefs including the one that told us we were incomplete without a partner, or someone ‘special’ in our life. For a long time I wanted to be taken care of by a man…in fact I remember my dad telling me that he would be so relieved when I got married so that another man could take care of me. oi vey! Thanks for sharing your personal story…and of course really, these stories are not personal are they? as we are discovering, these are universal issues that are being transformed. 🌴💚

      1. Elila

        Yes that certainly seems true where i sit!
        And my parents preached to me incessantly right out of the womb and into adulthood, “just find a man with something in his pockets besides his hands!” Oi vey indeed!

  12. Elila

    Good on you! It sounds like you have a lovely enjoyable relationship (between two whole people who are already “complete” in themselves) that still allows you the solitude we all crave to maintain our number one relationship with the lady in the mirror 😉💕. And props to you for waiting until it manifested organically without all the posing and manipulation women (&men!) feel SO pressured to initiate & struggle with!! Wow! If i could go back to your age, thats what i would do. Wait what am i saying–it IS what im doing! LOL

    Another idea for t-shirts could be

    PS Kat when i read your response that began “Me too…” I said “yes!” And punched the air Lol Lol

    Hugs to both of you brilliant ladies!

    1. Kat

      Elila and Maria,
      to add some further “weirdness” to the story, the man I am going out with is also substantially younger than me :D. 10 years, haha. Take that society 😀
      We still connect on a special level though, even though he is not into spirituality or anything else regarding the ascension process (he wouldn’t understand it even if I wanted to explain it to him, which I don’t). In fact we started out arguing about political stuff, and I always used to think that I wouldn’t be able to be with someone whose views go so much against mine, but life proved me wrong.
      I don’t know how complete he is, but he certainly is kinda “rooted” in himself, if you know what I mean? Dunno if you are into astrology (I do find it interesting and sometimes accurate) and he is a typical Taurus. Not easily upset and unflinching.
      Maria, I love your idea with the T shirts, haha, about time those old energy views get changed, and printing them on clothes is a good way to go about it.
      Yeah men feel that pressure, too. In a different way than us maybe (they are expected to be “studs” and get laid by as many women as they can) and they also would benefit from the deconstruction of old societal pressures.
      Big LOVE to you both! ❤ ❤ xx

      1. Haha…good for you, girlfriend!!! I think younger men are more open to newer ideas, as are the older men in ‘our’ group of ascension pioneers…….my second hubby was 17 years my junior. I was closer in age to him mom than to him 🙂 In fact, his parents were so welcoming of me into the family, and she and I became good friends. Joel and I spent 10 years together and were best friends. Even now, years after our divorce, we remain friends. (Eventually it turned out he wanted a family of his own, and I wanted something different). But he and I have an eternal bond. I learned so much from him and don’t regret my decision to marry him. I believe everyone in our life is there as a gift and us to them, too. Enjoy your time together!

      2. Elila

        First of all Kat,
        You go girl!! 😄😄 No need to analyze anything–if it feels lovely then simply allow yourself the enjoyment!
        And both of you, Maria & Kat,
        Oh my gosh the younger guy thing! I have felt for so many years now that if another relationship is in the cards for me, (and this is just a strong inner feeling based on no real outward evidence or attraction) –that it would likely be with a man probably 10-15 years younger! Part of it is that so many of the men my age are sort of cemented in their thinking, and a lot of them are in terrible health from not taking care of themselves (men need to self-love too! [& i cringe to think what most men would assume i mean by that…😝 Lol]).
        I have never really known where that idea of me and a younger man came from? But Maria what you describe with Joel sounds almost “familiar” in a way, like a “yes, of course…” in my being somewhere.

        Big love back ladies! 💙Xxx

        PS i would just like to say here, that i had this thought earlier whilst walking –there is a scene in one of my all time favorite movies, The Lake House, where Kates boss tells her “On your days off, go somplace where you feel….most like yourself.” I have wondered a great deal if there is a place like that for me. I have a few people im very close to that i adore, but none of them are aware of the A.P.-& like you said Kat, i dont feel like explaining it (impossible undertaking!). But it has become such an enormous part of my life, & my understanding & way of BEING–this overarching thing that touches all aspects of my existence….
        So i realized today that the place i feel most like myself, is right here with you amazing pioneers.
        Thank you Maria for this loving, supportive, nourishing & soothing space. 💕💚🌺💚💕😊

        1. Elila
          I loved that movie! And yes, more and more I feel that this small but intimate community of loving souls is my home, a beautiful reflection of the self love we are embracing. So I count my blessings too and say thank you!💕💕💕

      3. Kat

        Maria, I love your story with Joel. It sounds really beautiful. And I also love the fact that you are still friends and that his parents were so welcoming to you.

        Elila, you are right. No need to analyse this, just enjoy. And I don’t know how old you are, but you do sound like you would enjoy a relationship best with somebody who seems to be so full of life, like you, so maybe there’s a younger gentleman for you on the cards really soon 🙂

        “So i realized today that the place i feel most like myself, is right here with you amazing pioneers.
        Thank you Maria for this loving, supportive, nourishing & soothing space.”

        You know what, I had a good think about it, and that applies to me, too. This here is the only place, where I can discuss anything related to this all consuming process.
        What it makes even better is the fact, that not only can I talk to you guys about stuff that noone else would understand, but I also learn so much here and was calmed down so much by the words that I read here on this blog. I also absolutely love it and I m so grateful, that I found it. Thank you 🙂 ❤

        1. Kat,
          And I feel the same, I am so grateful for your love and support! And also know that your perspectives are always welcome. Even when they may be different than mine. This is a safe space for open discussions. Just don’t diss the chocolate🍫 or the coffee. ☕ I do have my limits! 🙅

    1. Elila

      Ditto! All hail the chocolate and the coffee!!! 🍫☕️🍫☕️🍫☕️

      I love this little community. I love that it feels like home here, and that i feel valued, that its warm & kind & accepting & intelligent & inspiring & full of love towards self and other, and i can be my real self, and that there is chocolate and coffee! (And cyber hugs!😉)

  13. Joanna

    Hello Ladies,

    Am just coming off a separation and would love to hear any tips on how you got to know more of who you are. I am getting over the guilt since he was a great wonderful guy but after 8 years of marriage i had this innate knowing that the continuation of marriage was not what my being wanted. I used to like helping people to the point where i came second but not anymore! I am looking forward to getting to know me and be just fine with being alone (single). The comments have really inspired me and i would love and appreciate any words of wisdom. Thank you!:))

    1. Hi Joanna,
      Well, you found the right place for lots of support.

      It sounds like you have a great deal of your own wisdom and you are trusting that wisdom. It sounds like you are definitely on the right track.

      If you haven’t yet done so, there are many posts here related to that topic, (The New, Enlightened Woman, Get Selfish and Stay There, The World Outside The Cafe, He Said, She Said, Letting Go of Being Uncomfortable, Who AM I?, A Message To Women, Independence Day-Releasing The Generational Curse, and many more.) Even typing in some keywords in the search will hopefully get you to appropriate posts.

      And of course there is just allowing the process of awakening, not pushing (That’s old, masculine energy). It’s a redefining of the Masculine and Feminine actually. And I’m sure the other ladies here can add their own personal wisdom. I am happy you asked the question.💙💛💜

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