Soulsoothinsounds's Blog

For those awakening divine humans

Feeling Vulnerable


I’ve been binge-watching an old t.v. series on Netflix called, Psych which is funny, light and entertaining.  But typically there is so much action and pursuit of something or someone, and so little of stopping and smelling the roses along the way.

The Simple Pleasures

The Simple Pleasures

But doing that would require being open.  And that openness makes many people feel so vulnerable.  It’s the feminine energies of receiving, of feeling and sensuality.  And this openness is at the very heart of our ascension process.  Most of us have been shut down because of our history of being so hurt, emotionally and physically, when we allowed ourselves to be open to love.  And not just in this lifetime, but it’s a galactic story.  And so now that we are required to open up to spirit, to our own divine self, to open our hearts and our bodies, we are still reluctant.

I know for myself, I have been shut down to a degree, not trusting that love…since the love I had experienced has been conditional for the most part.  I experienced a couple of traumatic events which helped to initiate a deeper connection with my soul, because I found myself up against the wall with really no other place to go.  But up to that point, I said, no, thanks, spirit, I’m just fine here…I can take care of myself.  I’ve done it this long.  No, It’s not the most fulfilling experience but at least I’m not at risk of being abandoned or worse!

Why would we want to risk an unrequited love, when our history speaks for itself in that department?  Or if we did allow that love from someone, we paid a pretty hefty price for it.


There’s a few of us on the planet who have chosen to be the first to walk out of their prison cells, leaving behind the safe and predictable and walking into the sunlight. Choosing our freedom.  We have a history of being the first to go through these experiences.  We are kind of ‘single minded’ that way.  Kind of adventurous.  But along the way we got a bit lost and didn’t want to feel that pain so we said no to spirit, kind of yes, then no, because we are still programmed to feel the hurt and humiliation.

Years ago, while I was talking to my mother, I raised my hand to just put on her shoulder and she quickly recoiled as if she was going to be struck.  At that moment I knew she had some pretty bad experiences in her childhood.  She never talked about any of that.  And it’s not a personal story, is it?

So, being open.  If you are experiencing feelings of being vulnerable more than usual, consider it a good sign.  It means you are opening even more to your soul and it’s bringing up old feelings that no longer serve you.

Let’s use an example.  A woman opens herself up to her lover, physically and emotionally.  In that moment you could say she is totally vulnerable.  That moment has been immortalized in art, music, film and books, as a sacred moment, a powerful moment.  In that moment she is allowing the man to become one with her, and to receive him with abandon and trust.  Now, we do not need to go into all the ways that can go and has gone wrong…that’s also been sung about, written about and hollywood has endless movies.  But, the point is, that’s what’s required of us as we open ourselves up to our soul.

And in that moment the mind’s  fears and needing to be in control spoils the experience of joy, of ecstasy as we unite with our beloved partner.  Those thoughts of not feeling worthy, of not trusting.  A buzz-kill to say the least.  Because our soul is in total love with us unconditionally.  No agenda, no expectations.  And that’s because our divinity (which our soul is a part of) is already fulfilled, already in love with itself, and doesn’t need to control or demand anything in return.  In fact, our divinity is wanting to bring to us our heart’s desires, to take care of all our needs.  And we all know how that feels when we are in that space and things just fall into place for us in a synchronistic way.  Guess who is in charge of that?  Not so much our mind.  It’s a co-creating with the expansive part of who we are.

So.  How do we get to more of that trust that our soul just wants to love us unconditionally?


The first requirement is to be o.k. with just where we are at, with where our human self feels stuck.  To be gentle with that part of ourselves that just doesn’t seem to get it.  Because then that acceptance begins to move the stuck energy. For myself, I feel that part of me, that human part is like a little girl who just feels lost.  I will offer her my hand and reassure her that I’m here for her.  She is just who she is.

Meanwhile our human self really needs more tangible experiences of feeling our soul in our body so that it can begin to trust that this relationship isn’t just all talk.

The next step is to just ask, how do I want to feel in this moment?  Take a few very deep deliberate breaths.  Don’t worry if you are nowhere near these feelings, but decide how you would like to feel.  Write it down if that feels good, or say out loud, and choose whatever you want:

 I want to feel good. I want to feel expansive.  I want to feel excited by life, I want to feel carefree.  I want to feel cared for, I want to feel playful, I want to feel fulfilled.  I want to feel sensual.  I want to feel good in this body!

 And then let it go.  You can go back to feeling anything you were feeling.  And then you will notice that in not too long a time you will begin to feel better, more inspired, more joyful, for no apparent reason.

Have you noticed in those moments of feeling so good for no apparent reason…other than you just wanted to feel good, that your senses open up, and you may even feel a body-wide tingling or rush of energy?  It sometimes feel like you are ‘stoned.’  Sometimes it feels so good you want to jump out of it, it’s almost too good.  It can feel very sexual.  For some people their soul enters their body through their feet and moves slowly upward, for others it may start in the crown and move downward, and for some it may come in through the Sacral chakra, through the sexual organs.

In those moments you are allowing your soul in and it’s sharing its love for you.  A love with no expectations, no agenda, no price to pay.

So could allowing our soul to be in us be as easy as just allowing ourselves to feel good?  Isn’t it more complicated?  Don’t we have to figure out our issues and process our feelings and heal ourselves first so that our soul will deem us worthy of its presence?  That’s like saying that our gall bladder or our lungs are not worthy of our heart pumping blood into them.

So we have figured out that feeling good gets us aligned with our divinity in a profound way, and from there we begin to see it reflected back in our daily experiences…but now we’re getting that feeling good, feeling sensual, is reason enough.  Because it feels so damned good to feel good!  (And it’s why not feeling good has become so damned intolerable.)

It feels good to feel good.  What a concept!

There are those who are searching high and low for the ‘secret.’  How to improve their lives, how to feel fulfilled, and there are seminars and books and programs….all for the most part  pretty complex, engaging the mind.  Because the mind loves complexity doesn’t it?  Otherwise it feels kind of left out.  Like it’s asking, “What am I, chopped liver?”  So our pride may take a hit because it’s not in control here.  It’s back to that feeling of vulnerability isn’t it?  It’s the feminine energy of allowing and receiving.  It’s seen as a weakness.  And yet, without it, we are not going to feel the fulfillment that is our birthright.  Oh, we can choose to leave this planet.  That is also honored.  And there on the ‘other side’ it’s so much easier to access those feelings because our human personality and all it’s conditions are not interfering.

But if we want to experience the ecstasy of our soul and our divinity with us here, we know what’s required.  You don’t need to figure it out, or heal yourself first, or wait.  It’s available right now and your beloved is just waiting for you.  And, your divine self is totally into you!!!

Enjoy Best Friend from Cosmic Blend:


copyright © 2016, Maria Chambers, All rights reserved. Please feel free to share this content with others, post on your blog, your Facebook page, etc, but maintain this article’s integrity by including the author and source website link: Maria Chambers at

Author: soulsoothinsounds

Our lives are like great paintings or great pieces of music. If we focus on all the technical 'imperfections' we will miss the true beauty of the work. We won't see, or rather, FEEL the essence and spirit of the masterpiece. I no longer identify myself as a writer, artist, or musician. Rather I express my divinity, and my humanity through the media of art, music and writing. I began this blog because I wanted to give voice to my experiences and insights, and I wrote for myself primarily. Eight years later, I am still writing for myself, and I am discovering that my experiences are not personal but universal - galactic even. And now I am more sure than ever that I am a new consciousness teacher, as each of you are. The way we teach is by going through the very human experiences, and as we ascend and shed our old selves, with love, and as we embody spirit in this lifetime, which we are all doing, we become the standards for others of the new divine human.

45 thoughts on “Feeling Vulnerable

  1. Dear Maria,

    Thank you for expressing this vulnerability so well. I have learned that in that vulnerability, in that opening to love that has been placed on my path, the shattering of my heart was purposeful. Each time, it allows all the shards to love anew, amplifies the love that I can flow through my heart. There were times I did not believe that I could exist with that level of heartache and yet….I know a greater capacity and more universal love as a result.
    It is that simple, feel good, allow our divinity to dance us.
    Thank you for allowing yours to dance though you so beautifully. After decades of running more masculine energy, I am so grateful to allow my feminine free reign. I trust my divinity, and in that, I can let go of a need to even trust myself. We are so cherished and loved.
    Much love to you,

  2. “Have you noticed in those moments of feeling so good for no apparent reason…other than you just wanted to feel good”

    I know those moments and I obviously adore them, but they always come spontaneously, without me wanting to feel good. They just pop up.
    I do actually feel quite good most of the time now, which is very pleasant. I feel I have been “stabilized” emotionally and spiritually if that makes sense?

  3. Maria, You are so wise and I am SO GLAD to have been led here to your site. You really know how to get to the heart of things! Sitting here reading your words drinking my morning cup of joe with an inner smile. I have a memory of what I call resonance creating so I can vibrate something and attract things in — to a degree. But it’s always temporary happiness and that is what many people spend their lives doing, chasing after things for that temporary happiness. For me true happiness is union with my inner light which is always there patiently waiting with unconditional love for me to stop, refocus on it, and then the smile comes. Ahhhh, my best friend.

    • Holly, first, i have to say, in spite of acknowledging that our joy is found within us, my morning coffee ritual must NEVER be messed with!!! That first sip…theres nothing like it!!! It really ‘grounds’ me, pun intended! And, second, i like your reference to you being your own best friend. ….think I’ll post my song called BEST FRIEND. Thanks for the inspiration!!! And I’m glad you were led here too. This has become an amazing and loving community of wise and fun loving souls!!!

  4. Yes Kat that makes perfect sense! And a wonderful place to be. Sometimes i find myself going a little headlong into a dark place emotionally, and i find voicing or even writing what i prefer to feel helps to bring it to me quicker. And i too notice that overall, my moods have been more joyful. It feels like i can more easily access my soul’s joy. It is like a breath of fresh air!!!

  5. “Feeling Vulnerable” I have been hearing these words from so many at this time, including my own self!
    I just LOVED Best Friend from Cosmic Blend!!

    Much love and Gratitude Maria for all you so graciously share! ❤ ❤ ❤

  6. Hello to all of my “soulsoothing” family!!
    Just checking in to see if anyone is experiencing these incoming/already here Waves of Energy!?
    I’ve been hearing that they may be felt in a variety of ways, depending on where you are on your Ascension path: “for some, they will assist in awakening, for some they will be upgrades remember (self-care), and for some, they will be shear bliss or new amazing moments and gifts, regardless….embrace verses resisting (questioning, trying to make sense of, worrying/wondering if you are okay or is this normal, etc.) Excerpt from
    I am happy to report that I am feeling the latter part at this time, whoa! It’s both blissful, and full exuberance!!

    Love, Light and Blessings to all ❤ ❤ ❤

    • Just yesterday I had a moment of pure joy and bliss. I was grinning from ear to ear and just shouted “YES” ! hahaha It was after imagingin winning the lottery, but that joy came from something different actually, it was pure and not connected to my imagination I felt.
      But on tuesday I fell down some steep stairs (made of metal) and really hurt my knee. That wasn’t so nice obviously, but I was glad that nothing worse happened.
      I have been having very intense dreams for a while now and waking up really tired. I wonder why that is. There was not a night in the past couple of weeks that I haven’t dreamt something that felt profound.

      • Hey Kat, yipeee yeeehaaa to bliss-filled moments!!!!

        I had a tumble on the street a few months ago…for me it was because i was not in my body..i was preoccupied with something, some thinking about things instead of just feeling. But sometimes i get disoriented while walking like i am moving in and out of different dimensions….and i bump into things…lately ive been a little disoriented, putting stuff in the freezer that belongs in the fridge, leaving items at the cafe, always making sure i have my wallet (haha)…like a spacey feeling. I mean we ARE operating more and more from the fifth dimension so there’s bound to be some disorientation…so i have been making sure i am connecting to my soul so that i do not get too discombobulated.(wow i havent used that word in years!)

  7. Hi Anette
    Well, for me its been unusually stressful. A series of events involving my new washer dryer and some chemical smell its emitting has triggered some very strong fear responses in me. Some say its new machine smell and it will fade, some say it hasn’t for them, and i have a small place and I’m sensitive to certain smells. But we know that its rarely about the situation is it? For me it seems the physical, environmental and bodily challenges are the most difficult And trigger the highest anxiety. I practice lots of self care but sometimes i still feel disconnected from my soul, other times i feel amazing bliss. But lately, whew, not so much!

    But when i do feel connected i can see the bigger picture and know all is well! I can even laugh about it! I mean the worst scenario is i return the machines and do my wash the old fashioned way—send it out to the laundry, easy on the starch! (Althouth most of the laundromats have fabric softener smell in their machines which i detest! Which are actually made from toxins ) i have heard that as we integrate our crysralline light body we will not be as sensitive to things. THAT i look forward to.

    • I wanted to add to my comment, these fears i experience….they feel ANCIENT. Something i inherited from those before me, as they did from those before them! So in that sense i can detach from them even as i feel them.

    • Hi Maria!
      I do hope you are feeling less stressful, and that you got everything figured out with your new washer and dryer, and don’t have to go back to the old fashion way, for me that would in tale filling up my wringer washer…LOL I did enjoy that machine!! (No I’m really not that old) teehee! I can so relate to the sensitivity to smells, and taste as well, here especially in the last year!!
      I wanted to touch on the anxiety/fear you have spoke about….last month I had absolutely terrible anxiety out of the blue that lasted for several weeks, not that I have not experienced a tremendous amount through out my my childhood, and into my adult life, but I had really gotten a handle on it, so I thought! This makes me wonder about it be “Ancient”!? Given this info. if it happens again maybe I will be able to detach a lot quicker!!
      I’m still feeling very “up”, however I did have to speak with the Universe and ask if the “Incoming/Intense Light could be toned down a bit, ( that worked, and I’m grateful) as I was moving just a tad too fast, and doing what you spoke about to Kat i.e. feeling a bit discombobulated, and I have used that word a lot as of late…lol
      It truly is amazing what our bodies/minds are undergoing…I’m looking forward to fully integrating my light body, and the benefits that will come with that!!! Oh yeah, that will be awesome!
      Take care my friend, and as always THANK YOU for being YOU ❤

      • Annette,
        I believe the w/d situation is being resolved as i just do some wash it seems to be helping dissipate the new machine smell. Thats funny, i grew up using a Maytag ringer washer and we hung the wet wash on the clothsline to dry. Simple but effective.
        So its interesting because the theme seems to be fear and anxieties with some sadness mixed in. And not taking it personally DOES help. otherwise it becomes our problem that we believe is about our life and our bodies. And its so easy to go there and then we’re in drama.

        And yep its definitely intense out there and becoming more so. It seems in the times to come we need to be more discerning about who we are giving our allegiance to, our human conditioned self, or our expansive self. Because otherwise its going to be rough being here.

        And to remind ourselves we are not novices. To have gotten this far, we are in the advanced stages of our enlightenment. Or i should say, our embodied enlightenment. Love to you. 💕💕💕💕

  8. Dear Maria,

    “was not in my body..i was preoccupied with something, some thinking about things ”

    Same here! That usually always happens when I m somewhere else mentally.

    ” i am moving in and out of different dimensions”

    That, too. But before I fell I was clearly thinking about something else instead of being in the moment,

    Today is a weird day though. I feel a bit cranky or sad and I have headache.
    I want the bliss back! Lol

    how are you feeling now?

  9. Kat,
    honestly, lately it’s been challenging feeling connected. When things come up to deal with in the daily life stuff, I can get triggered into the mind stuff…I feel a cold coming on, so I’m slowing down and relaxing…some self-nurturing…some good self massage (especially the shoulder and neck area) for me a tense area because I’m trying to shoulder this process by myself too much of the time…without the benefit of my soul.

    I’m sure I’m also picking up on the intense energies around me, and in mass consciousness….and yes, me too…I have been feeling cranky and sad…achey especially around the forehead area and sinus areas….I wonder if others are experiencing similar symptoms right now.

    • It’s become a bit heavy now for me, too so I can understand.
      So annoying that the blissful moments seem to be so short but feelig crap seems to last forever.

      “I feel a cold coming on, so I’m slowing down and relaxing…some self-nurturing”

      yeah, slow down and nurture yourself. You can never go wrong with this.
      I wish you and me and everyone else some joy-filled and adventurous times ahead ❤

      • P.S. I feel heavy on the shoulders today as well. Head and shoulder are both feel tense.
        I haven’t had any dark thoughts or anything, the feeling of sadness just came up spontaneously. Probably some clearing going on right now

  10. *head and shoulder area both feel tense

  11. Hi y’all!
    Just wanted to chime in–i have also been having headaches, especially in the third eye area, every night for a week so far. I usually only get them when there are solar flares or geomagnetic storms but this last week they have been persistent (but not as painful as usual). Me too on the neck and shoulder pain, and also on the super intense dreams this past week (really bizarre stuff!) and waking up tired. It feels like a lot of really gross OLD energy is being processed out in my sleep. AND the sadness/agitation out of nowhere! Kat you got a big “oooooh yeah” out of me with what you said about the bliss being fleeting but feeling crap seems to last forever. I also have the in & out of dimensions feeling and bumping into things or tripping. Kat im so glad you werent hurt worse too! And Maria i am also SUPER sensitive to chemical smells (and fabric softener [haaaaate!], and cig smoke, even peoples sunscreen or face cream or deoderant–ugh) –it triggers horrible migraines and nausea. I would love for THAT to go away too! And yes for me too the fear triggers feel so SO ancient, and does make it easier to defuse them a bit even in the moment. It feels like im in another agitate/spin cycle in the old ascension wash machine lol. I have been wondering if anyone else was having more difficulty feeling connection or bliss because usually i experience bouts of it pretty regularly and the crap feelings seemed to be lessening and while they were around i could feel confident that they would pass & id soon get another glimpse of happy-for-no-reason, but lately the ratio seems to have flipped on me? Whats up with that?
    Oh but the master number sightings have continued –but with all this other stuff im not quite as comforted by it….
    Maria im glad too we can all hold hands thru this stuff!
    Love to you all 💙

    • Elila,
      Good to hear from you. Well, it’s interesting we seem to be experiencing similar emotions, coupled with some physical symptoms…I like your analogy of the agitate/spin cycle….and speaking of spin cycles, I just purchased a beautiful Washer /dryer and it’s working great. The technician said to just run a few loads of wash through it to get rid of the new machine smell, which I was NOT enjoying, because like you, I am sensitive and almost compulsive about avoiding such smells as perfumes, fabric softeners, etc. In fact, the reason I decided to invest in a new washer/dryer is because initially I leased one but they are all used and smell horrible of fabric softener. So now I have to contend with this new machine smell, go figure!

      But I sense that as we integrate our light body these things will get easier and we will not be so sensitive, because let’s face it, life is a bitch if we have to go around in a ‘bubble’ avoiding this and that. It’s just too much maintenance for me!!!

      We know on a deep level that life is meant to flow, and that all our needs are met easily and synchronistically. It will be interesting to see who else weighs in with what they are experiencing.

    • Elila,
      I can so relate to the smell aversion. I am also super sensitive to strong, chemical smells. I hate it when someone smokes close to me (although I used to smoke myself) and while I was still working in an office with several other people I had to leave the room for periods of time, because I couldn’t stand the perfume of one of the colleagues. It just smelled so disgusting, I was baffled how noone else felt close to throwing up haha

      • Olfactory offense! How about those moments when someone who just bathed in some kind of perfume gone wrong lunges toward you and gives you a big hug! Andd they’re wearing the kind of perfume that is essential oil based which means you may as well throw away the clothes you were wearing.

        Apparently there are no scent awareness policies now in some companies and even at certain performances like the opera where they “ask patrons to curb their cologne.”

    • ” Kat you got a big “oooooh yeah” out of me with what you said about the bliss being fleeting but feeling crap seems to last forever”

      @ Elila Yeah I feel like I have to pay for every tiny moment of bliss with a long period of headache, sadness, feeling agitated or whatnot.
      Maybe those bliss moments are sign that we reached a new level. Like in video games? haha

      @Maria: “Apparently there are no scent awareness policies now in some companies ”

      Yeah, honestly I feel that should be mandatory! In restaurants and cafes as well though. I can’t enjoy my food if someone who rolled around in the nastiest perfume sits close to me

  12. Maria–
    Haha i borrowed the washing machine analogy from one of YOUR old posts! Lol
    Man i can sure relate–when i was still in FL i had to stop usin the laundry room altogether because of all the fabric softener and heavily perfumed soap stuck in the washer. I just washed everything in the sink (not that hard when its mainly just a couple bikinis and a couple shorts & tees)! Where i am now i was able to clean out the machines well enough to where i can use them and make sure only unscented natural soap goes in now and NO toxic softener! I would be like you having a very difficult time with that new machine off-gassing–just thinking of it hurts my head lol. And you are sure right–it HAS been a bitch trying to live life in a darn bubble! So much i have to avoid & take into account that others dont even think of or notice. Gosh it would be nice for some of this stuff to EASE UP already!!!

    PS just recently i managed to win a years long battle of getting my mother to stop allowing a relative to SMOKE in the house–i mean who DOES that anymore??? It was pure torture and plenty of migraines for me –what a relief that at least THAT siege is finally over 😜

    • hey Elila…. totally random and silly… but did you notice both me and yours icons next to our name when we post here have changed all a sudden? both of us used to have super faint yellow icons(i always noticed cause both of ours looked almost the same lol) now yours is sorta a pretty periwinkle blue and mine’s an aqua blue. totally just changed out nowhere and both to more bright colors, so maybe a bit symbolic of an energy shift for us haha? i like my new one better so im ok with it 😀

    • Elila oh yeah smoking in the house, thats definitely gotta go!!! Congrats!! My 2nd husband smoked and i made him sit near an open window and blow the smoke outside. Even in the winter. He got tired of that and quit cigarettes for good.

  13. Omg Maria the hug stink transfer thing!!!!! That happens all the time where i hug someone and then am tormented by their residue for the rest of the day! Some of their face cream or makeup will get on my cheek, a little deo on shoulder, their perfume–and i end up in a bathroom trying to get it off of me and my face –in vain! Its maddening! I dont want to give up the few hugs i still get lol, so i feel trapped.
    Amd kat yes my last indoor job i kept having to go outdoors because of all the perfumes and deos making me sick. I also have allergic reactions to it all that can trigger asthma attacks & rashes on top of the migraines–good times! Its so hard to go just about anywhere because of it –everyone and everything is perfumed. Stores pump it thru their air systems. Rental cars reek of febreeze. Or how about getting stuck on an airplane next to the guy who just took a bath in a can of Axe??? I dont know how i could EVER work anywhere again–perfume seems to be taking over the world.
    And the smoking!! My sensitivity to smoke is thru the roof–and i used to smoke too, Kat! Its crazy.
    Its EXACTLY like you said for me as well, that it seems any little bit of bliss has to be paid for with a long bout of poo-ey sadness headachy agitated ick. I have read that those spots of bliss actually DO mean that we have reached another level, and that the poo feeling period that follows is the integrative period where we “download” or embody the new energy?
    Sweet pea–not random or silly at all–that is exactly the kind of thing i would note too, but i did not notice the icons, because i am on a mobile device and their arent any! But i LOVE that you relayed the change, because blue is my favorite color and id like the new shade MUCH better too! Im sure that just because we are aware of it and wondering & talking about it that it probably DOES represent a shift of SOME sort lol! I am ALL FOR bolder and brighter (and anything that is scent free and more attractive than it was before
    LOL 😜😄😜😄)

    • Elila you are so bloody funny! 😀 Such an amazing sense of humour. I know for sure we’d get on really well in real life

      “I have read that those spots of bliss actually DO mean that we have reached another level, and that the poo feeling period that follows is the integrative period where we “download” or embody the new energy?”

      That would make sense. I interpreted the yuckiness after the bliss moment as a new phase of clearing. Maybe we are digging deeper and deeper? I don’t know for sure, but I do know that I would like the joy and bliss moments last longer and come more frequently.

  14. Aw thanks Kat! I consider that high praise. Humor is all i have left to get through this process with any shred of (whats left of) my sanity. Without it id just be one of those scary grumpy cat ladies who grumble instead of speaking–without the cats, lol. And im so sure you are right that we would get on marvelously!
    Oh and can we GET a hell yes for longer more frequent bliss hits???!!!?? 💜💙💜

    • ” I consider that high praise”

      It is very high praise 🙂

      And humour does make us endure hard times much much better. I heard doctors and nurses saying that they wouldn’t be able to cope with some cases in the hospital if they didn’t make jokes about them. And I am saying jokes about very ill people. It might sound cruel to us outsiders, but it does help them cope and go in with their hard work.

      Yesterday was quite crappy for me. I felt really pissed off all day and agitated. I do feel better today so far though, but still nowhere as near as bliss. Sure it’ll come soone 🙂

      Much LOVE

  15. Kat-
    I feel ya sister. I dont know what it is or what is going on, but it seems like that pissy irritable agitated general moroseness is hanging on lately (like a cloud that wont pass?) and i havent been getting the bliss hits as frequently? Its not necessarily the same intensity every day, but the last couple weeks at least have been blah at best. Im starting to feel like a bliss junkie who needs a hit of the good stuff lol

    • yeah exactly the same here. Today was weird, I felt agitated and somehow scared all day; scared of losing someone close to me. Never felt like that before, well not that intense at least. When I’m in such a mood I can’t even imagine how those bliss moments feel like.
      Earlier today I concluded how this is actually a good thing for me to not remember the bliss anymore. It means I should concentrate on that uncomfortable feeling (not in the sense that I have to cling on it) and the joy will come naturally. Don’t know how to explain that more properly, but I think you catch my drift.

    • gosh i wish i could connect with the bliss stuff again too 😦 i haven’t felt any kinda bliss in a long minute. i love that stuff so much cause it takes me out of the heavy of this awful 3rd/4th dimension place i’m trapped in.

      i’ve been hit by soooo much 3D mess about lately… you know stuff like physical health issues, computer problems, appliance problems, packages getting lost, people being unbearably rude when i go places, etc…. basically the kind of stuff that’s wrapped up in “3D conflict energy”. it’s not that it’s completely unbearable, it’s just frustrating, and forces you to deal with the heavy “struggle energy” of the physical world. it’s been quite a bit of one thing after another so much lately that i’ve been mercilessly disconnected from spirit and bliss. i hate the phases like this when you get forced to spend so much time in that yucky mentally exhausting problem solving head space 😦 again, it’s not that it’s impossible stuff to overcome, it just all feels like pointless distraction from going towards something better and like i keep getting pulled back down into limitation when i’m trying rise up :\

      i just want so sooooo bad to be light and free and healthy and happy and inspired 💜💜💜 more bliss yes pleasssse lol

  16. Yes kat i get it. Its like if i could clearly recall the bliss feeling then this “NOT bliss” space would feel even worse. And i would be focused on remembering the bliss & how it felt and not really HERE NOW processing out the gunk i guess. Idk anymore ha.
    And sweet pea–everything you said–yes. Yes. Great description. It all feels like im crossing a mountain range with a 200lb pack on my back only to get a few crumbs here and there.
    Another heavy day today, but still got lots of love for our little family here 💕💜💕. Thank the universe for you all!!!

    • “Yes kat i get it. Its like if i could clearly recall the bliss feeling then this “NOT bliss” space would feel even worse. And i would be focused on remembering the bliss & how it felt and not really HERE NOW processing out the gunk i guess. Idk anymore ha.”

      Exactly! I was a bit lost for words yesterday (sometimes that happens during this process) but you stated it perfectly.
      Today, the base feeling was sadness and fear. I just told the universe, if it’s not mine then take it away from me. No more processing for other people. I just don’t want to do this anymore, and really, a part of the sadness just vanished. There is still some left, but I do identify it as my own. An inner sadness that has been stuck in the system for a very long time, that I wanted to process for ages, but it was kinda hard to reach. It was persistent in its refusal to be processed and let go of. I remember it being in my system since childhood really, and I asked the universe the other day for a release of it. So maybe that has been happening the past couple of days? Maybe the sadness I’ve been feeling was actually the release process?
      Anyone familiar with those old persistens emotions that you kinda couldn’t get rid of (or ’embrace’ and let go) for a very long time?

  17. Haha Kat i sure know what you mean about being lost for words–ot happens to me so frequently now. Sometimes icamt even come up with them to respond here when i want to. Its maddening!
    And i think you are probably right about this being old stuck emotions and that this is likely the releasing process–that feels correct to me. I have also had a sort of sad, defeated, emotional overlay since childhood. A certain hopelessness or futility feeling mixed with fear i think. Gotta say the general poo-ey feeling is sure holding on for me lately. And the moment i start to feel any lightening of it, something immediately jumps on and quashes it, like within minutes! Its WEIRD. But hey whatever–i got nothin left but letting it do whatever its doing LOL 😜
    I really hope it IS just releasing all that old low vibe emotion. Saying it just now something in me is like yeah–of course it is….

    • “I really hope it IS just releasing all that old low vibe emotion. Saying it just now something in me is like yeah–of course it is….”

      Absolutely the same here.
      I a big fat YES to this:

      “. I have also had a sort of sad, defeated, emotional overlay since childhood. A certain hopelessness or futility feeling mixed with fear i think”

      Very good description of that emotion I have been feeling for so long that hopefully is getting released now.

      Love and a big hug to you dear Elila 🙂 ❤

  18. *and a big fat yes

  19. Im hugging you back lovely Kat
    Love to you!

  20. I have been feeling very depressed and become a recluse I am living in fear all the time why?

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