Soulsoothinsounds's Blog

For those awakening divine humans

Take Up Space

43 Comments

Art by Maria Chambers

All of my life, up until the light body process, I was a skinny person.  I could eat anything in any amount and not gain an ounce.  In fact, when I was a teenager, in the early 60s, the beauty ideal for the female was well-rounded and voluptuous, so I yearned to gain some girth.

I tried weight gain supplements to no avail.  Eventually, though, thin became fashionable for girls and women, so I fit in for a period of time.  Then, with the light body process underway, in the early 90s I gained a substantial amount of weight,

I barely recognized myself.  But I knew it was part of the process, at least in the initial stages of ascension. But it took its toll on me emotionally, on my ego especially.  I kept buying larger and larger sizes of pants and shirts.

I went from about 100 lbs to almost 180 lbs within a couple of years.  It took some adjusting on my part, but I eventually accepted the extra weight, and decided to see it as beautiful.

Since that time I have shed weight, not by dieting or exercise, but simply because it’s a part of this process.  The body begins to just balance itself.

No, I will never weigh 100 pounds again, and that’s a good thing.

It’s fascinating how the standards of beauty for women are so stringent.  Especially when it comes to being thin.  Now, if someone is naturally thin, and healthy, that is wonderful, and that is beautiful.  But if that is the only standard, that is extremely dangerous.

Three friends at the cafe

Some attribute the origin of this unrealistic and unhealthy standard to the fashion industry.  Clothes designers and retailers wanted the clothes to stand out, not the woman’s body.  While that in itself is a troubling statement, what is important is that no one really questions why it continues to be perpetuated.

Even in the new age community and in spiritual imagery, the holy person is seen as trim,  not to mention alien races embodying tall and thin bodies.

Is it any wonder that people, women especially are in a low self mage crisis?

A male acquaintance of mine from the coffee shop periodically compares his arms to mine, saying he wishes we could trade because my arms are bigger than his, even though he has at least 30 more pounds of weigh on him than I do.

For men, it’s desirable to be bigger, more bulked out.

Art by Maria Chambers

So I had to wonder, why isn’t it so for women?  Is part of the reason because we are not allowed to take up as much space as men?  Of course in some countries a full-bodied person of any gender is equated to health and opulence.  I remember when I visited Greece I was seen as quite unhealthy.  At the time I was about 110 lbs.

Many are questioning the old concept of a woman having to look emaciated.  We are seeing more full-bodied models and even very heavy ones as the new standard of beauty.  It sends the clear message that all body types are beautiful.

It is a step toward women’s personal freedom.  Especially if a woman is not naturally thin, and goes through unhealthy extremes to get to thin.  President Trump loves to value a woman by how she looks, and as if that is not bad enough, he tries to demean her by calling her fat, or a ‘pig.’

But of course he is just a symptom of the problem.  It seems the worst insult to a woman is she is unattractive, and the worst insult to a man is he is woman-like.

So, part of the awakening process is, first to recognize we are not these bodies. We are not defined by them.  But that the bodies we do inhabit are beautiful.  To feel proud of taking up space.   And especially as women, to not hide who we are.

And to express through our physical bodies.  To allow life to course through us, and to allow our soul to be part of that experience.

Now, excuse me, but I have to get back to my hero sandwich…time to bulk up!

© Copyright 2018 Maria Chambers, all rights reserved. P!ease feel free to share this content within others but maintain the article’s integrity by copying it unaltered and by including the author and source website link: Maria Chambers, http://www.soulsoothinsounds.wordpress.com

Author: soulsoothinsounds

Our lives are like great paintings or great pieces of music. If we focus on all the technical 'imperfections' we will miss the true beauty of the work. We won't see, or rather, FEEL the essence and spirit of the masterpiece. I no longer identify myself as a writer, artist, or musician. Rather I express my divinity, and my humanity through the media of art, music and writing. I began this blog because I wanted to give voice to my experiences and insights, and I wrote for myself primarily. Eight years later, I am still writing for myself, and I am discovering that my experiences are not personal but universal - galactic even. And now I am more sure than ever that I am a new consciousness teacher, as each of you are. The way we teach is by going through the very human experiences, and as we ascend and shed our old selves, with love, and as we embody spirit in this lifetime, which we are all doing, we become the standards for others of the new divine human.

43 thoughts on “Take Up Space

  1. Maria I agree with all you have said here. I was naturally slender eating anything I wanted until about late twenties I think and then the yo-yo began. So I have been thin and heavy (tipping scales over 200lbs at one point; normal for me is about 120-130). I have gained huge amounts and lost huge amounts a couple times now. For me at this point it has nothing to do with my appearance or how much space I inhabit. It’s all about comfort and mobility. This heavier body slows me down and has pains and discomforts directly resulting from extra weight that i never experienced when thinner and it affects how I feel–it feels limiting to me and not empowering at all. I have no desire to meet some standard of attractiveness– I just want to move freely and feel energetic. I want to be able to stand from a seated position without using my hands/arms and not have my poor knees aching under the excess load!! (I’m carrying about 30-40lbs more than I can handle at present)

    • Agreed, Elila, comfort and health take prescedence over everything else, for sure. For me too, my weight has gone up and down over the years. But I think what happens in this process is over time the extra weight will come off naturally. I noticed for me that started happening about two years ago. Much to our consternation, it seems that the physical body is the last to catch up with our consciousness. I think it’s one of the most challenging issues in this whole process, really!

  2. Yes, the ups and downs of weight have been challenging. When I gained about 40 pounds I figured it must have something to do with gravity… i.e. I needed to be heavier so I didn’t get so light-bodied that I floated off the planet! Then I lost about 50 pounds and got way too thin so that I felt invisible. Though I again could lose ten pounds, I’m okay with me. Agree with you Elila, I would prefer to stay at a weight I can carry comfortably.

    Maria, the picture, “Three Friends at the Cafe”, the look on the elderly lady’s face absolutely touched my heart. How beautiful she is. Is the picture your artwork? Love, B.

    • Barbara, the elderly woman in the group did have a lovely countenance. No, its not an artwork. it’s a photo I took this morning at Starbucks, and I put a black and while filter on it. It’s the first time I saw the women. They seemed to be such close friends with each other.

  3. Ah, yes, the weight (or bulk) ‘issue!’ It has been going on for me ever since I became conscious of our evolution. Luckily I was brought up that we are still who we are whether huge or tiny or somewhere inbetween. Thanks Mum and Dad!! My weight/bulk does its own thing. As you say, Elila, the discomfort/lack of ease is the challenge, not failing to be slim enough for the approval of anyone. But here’s the wierd one…..does anyone else have this?…..Sometimes, even when I am rather larger, people will say to me, ‘Oh, you look amazing, you’ve lost loads of weight’ when I really haven’t.

  4. Maria–most challenging issues indeed my friend! I asked for a fat bank account and a slender body and I got the opposite! For me the money thing and the body things are the absolute top two and I’d be hard pressed to rate which is harder. Both issues keep me feeling perpetually uncomfortable and unsafe and the only relief is consciously engaging my eff-it attitude –solace in apathy lol. A life without these two issues would be so otherworldly and fantastical I can scarcely remember or imagine it, let alone “feel into it”, although I do think I’m doing a pretty good job of relaxing and allowing, all things considered.

    Barbara–so amazing that you bring up gravity because I have been saying for years now that it feels as if gravity for me has doubled somehow. The first time I lost a lot of weight it was about 50lbs and the second time it was closer to 90. (For awhile I thought only this current 30-40lb gain was the only ascension related one but looking back they probably all were.) So I know how my body feels at different weights and I tell you THIS feels like it did when I was at my absolute heaviest at over 200, instead of just 30 or so extra pounds it feels like 100. And it seriously feels like it’s gravity related and it changes periodically–sometimes I can actually feel gravity ease up on me and I don’t feel so cripplingly heavy and can move easier, but it’s not very often. Still the difference is noted. So frustrating! And I too read somewhere that ascension weight was to keep us ” grounded” and from floating away with spirit into the ethers so to speak, and that the extra weight and especially the bloat/water was to protect us from all the intense energy (solar) blasts inundating us/the planet so as not to fry all our circuits. And this all makes perfect sense to me …..but wow the discomfort is HARD. Especially in contrast to where I was just 6 years ago before I left florida–i had gotten to a point where i was all tan and warm and healthy and slender and then I came here and watched it all slowly evaporate. It feels like I had gotten pretty close to paradise and lost it all. AGAIN. This process seems so brutal–like managing to climb out of a deep pit only to be knocked into the next one and have to start all over. I am at the point now where I can no longer struggle to climb out. The rest of this process is gonna have to be easy and pleasant or I don’t wanna play anymore!!!!

    Gail–yes I’ve heard that too! I assume it’s when I’m particularly connected to myself and feeling spirit and “got my glow on” haha that people just think I look better than I do! But the physical discomfort is the thing, no matter what others perceive it’s a non-negotiable for me that I need to be able to feel good and move comfortably in this body, and also have enough money to live simply/simply live. Otherwise what’s the damn point of all this?

    Group hug my dears 😊💕

    • Thank you, Elila, for your understanding of gravity and I confess I had not heard of the reasoning behind bloat, but it makes sense… and heaven knows we’ve all had enough of that to float this planet, but thing is, for me, I can handle the physical side of this process, though sometimes the frustration of not being able to make any plans just in case I vertigo/nausea/throw up/cramp up/panic attack/intuitively know, “Don’t go there”, while I’m out and about does leave me impatient, but by far what is hardest for me is the emotional side. My heart keeps getting broken over and over, and I know this is true for everyone here at Maria’s Place, we just do not understand or identify with cruelty in any form, and because we know that all beings are conscious, the hurt of that leaves us kind of broken and bewildered. I do indeed have a sense of humor, but sometimes that just doesn’t cut it. Where… in our lifetimes this will take us is yet to be discovered, but damn, it ain’t easy. Love to all here. B

      • Oh wow Barbara me too I can so relate and resonate with having our hearts broken so relentlessly, and I have NEVER in my life been able to withstand or understand cruelty. I too have been betrayed and heartbroken more than I can bear, and I think it has resulted in a sort of pulling back protection mode, kind of like a best friend standing up to a bully for you, only I am the best friend AND the protected one if that makes any sense? I think it’s me protecting and loving me the way no other person ever has. And I do have to be super conscious and careful about what I “ingest” in this world–like no watching the news or sad movies or violence etc. This specific being needs to carefully focus (until it becomes second nature easy) on things that feel good and nourishing, energizing, uplifting. I get the “burying head in sand” accusation, but I know in my soul for now at least it’s the only way I can stay here.
        Love back to you💙

        • Burying our heads in the sand, yes quite a popular accusation. My take is that EVERYONE is burying their heads in sand, much more than we are, really. It’s just that we are very fussy about which sand we choose!! xxx

          • So true Gail! The people who say it have their heads buried far deeper than I. I have said before there is a huge difference between hiding/denial and CAREFUL DISCERNMENT! Contrary to our conditioning, we have the right to choose the very BEST for ourselves and to feel good! 😊💕

          • Yes, Elila, there’s a big difference… what is interesting to me is that the people who are really deepest in denial about what’s going on in the world are those who ingest the news everyday, see the horror everyday, engage in damaging drama everyday and seem to think that it is all ‘reality’ and is NORMAL!! The other deniers are the new-agers who close their eyes to it all and somehow write it all off as ‘it’s all illusion’ or ‘they’ve created it for themselves’ (little children in Syria??? I don’t think so!) or ‘it’s their Karma.’ or ‘they just need to learn to love themselves’ ……Whose heads are in the sand, man??

            I suppose we can only be able to choose the best for ourselves when we realise that all the shit is NOT Normal…..but that is what all the inner work has been about. So I kind of understand why they think we are unrealistic. We know we can never expect understanding from unawakened ones, but it is still super-frustrating to be told that WE are the ones avoiding reality!!

          • Such great points Gail! I also find it kind of arrogant that they unquestionably think THEIR “reality” should supercede mine. But it’s really just ignorance and fear I suppose. What those people don’t realize about all that obsessive “paying attention” to their “reality” is that its actively FEEDING and perpetuating that drama filled horrific loop. What you focus on expands….,and so you keep getting more of it…..and it becomes your “normal”….. So yeah perhaps you are right that somehow it’s needs to be recognized that that shiz ain’t normal!!! And yep it’s frustrating but really most of the stuff that comes out of people’s pieholes these days I realize they really need to be saying to a mirror, not me. The unawakened doth tend to
            projecteth too much LOL

          • You are spot on Elila. It’s totally arrogant!!

            The obsessive paying attention is what I’ve referred to as ‘dwelling upon.’ What it does is keeps an energetic doorway open for external (i.e.
            not their own soul’s) forces to continually enter their mind and thereby take control of their thoughts and behaviour.

            So it really becomes the external force insisting that the person continues to dwell upon that which allows the external force access. (The Loop!!) It used to be called possession.

            I do have hope however, as SOME people are seriously questioning the ‘normality’ or reasonableness of alot of it, even though they are still rather focussing on it all. But I remember my process being like that….I focussed on something until I understood it or got to grips with what it was REALLY about, and then I didn’t need to focus on it any more. Then I moved onto other focusses until I understood them….. and so on and so on!

            Maybe some people will never question the normality or get to grips….or maybe I’m just impatient with this tedious finger-drumming I’ve been doing for what feels like an eternity, waiting for them to catch on. I think this is where Maria’s ‘it’s time to enjoy life’ comes in and saves the day.

            So very much ENJOYING our conversations!!! Lots of Love, Gail xxx

            Ps ….need to be saying to a mirror, not me….love it!!

          • Oh yes Gail–time to enjoy life indeed! Right where we are, regardless of bloat and heft, finger drumming and all (ha that so cracked me up–so true, so true)! And yep I too love these convos so very much. Being able to chat with those who totally GET it is so comforting and affirming and just keeps me going on this nutty ride! Love back to you 💙💙💙

  5. Elila…..got my glow on…..I love that xxx

  6. I wrote earlier but the computer ‘system’ froze me out somehow, so here goes trying again….

    Dear Barbara, I so get the heartbroken. A friend recently said that he is heartbroken when he hears or sees about Syrian and African children….me too, but I am also heartbroken that people actually DO that to other people. I am heartbroken by the predicament of humanity. I feel like I want to be Nanny McPhee and bang my stick on the ground and send out caring-for-each-other vibes. It must be my human me feeling into my cosmic me and feeling as if I could really do that in an instant……timelessness filtering through into time-boundness. This heartbroken-ness is what makes me feel like nothing worldly is worth pursuing and giving my energy to.

    The gravity thing is weird. Some days I can hardly drag myself out of bed or off the sofa, yet other days I can sprint up a hill so lightly or even climb a tree. My little grandson can’t understand why one day I can join in (and even surpass him) physically and another day only be able to sit and watch a damn film with him!!

    Elila – ‘ I asked for a fat bank account and a slender body and I got the opposite!’ He he he, so funny xxx I think you are right about the two main things/issues being money and body. How I have dreamt into neither mattering or existing in the restrictive sense they do now. I do touch that sometimes but then it thunders back in with a wallop. Oh FFS, wonder sometimes if it will ever end, but deep inside I know it will, somehow.

    To share some joy…..A friend just sent me for a Turkish bath and massage today. Glorious; my body really needed such care and the woman practitioner was really lovely. She is about to go away to Georgia to help children and I was her last massage before she went.

    I’m so glad to connect with you guys. It’s the first time I’ve been able to be real without getting resistance……Thank you all xxx

    • Me too Gail–i feel it for a moment then it “thunders back with a wallop”. And I have wondered (as recently as yesterday lol) if it will ever end, but yes I know somehow we’ll get to the other side of it. You used the word “restrictive” and yep that is exactly it–it just feels so limiting and I feel like where we are headed is more UNlimited so anything that feels limiting won’t work anymore and will need to fall away.
      Glad you are here and sharing, Gail. I think most if not all of us feel the same way about this being the one place we can be real, and by gathering and sharing here it helps us all–so thanks to you too 💙💙💙

  7. Reblogged this on elizabethsadhu and commented:
    Amen, sister, amen!

  8. Amen, dear Sistar Goddess, amen!

    Yep, holdng about 30-40 extra pounds.

    Recently been focusing on the fact that I am Strong! Not heavy.

    Yesterday, I rode my bike to exercise class, rode home. Then went on a four mile walk. Then gardened for 3 hours. Riding bicycle to and from all these activities. This was A BUSY day.

    We dance, vigorously, most weekends, and about 8 weekends a year, dance ALL weekend.

    My honey and I rode about 18 miles the other day. We do some yoga/stretching every day.

    I am not letting that extra weight hold me back.

    Acting as if I am the perfect weight RIGHT NOW. AND guess what, I AM??!!?!! ♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️

    Life is fucking awesome!

    I eat what I want. Sometimes it seems that I MUST eat a lot of bread and butter! Ha!

    Love and thanks!

    • Well, my dear siSTAR goddess, you must be in pretty damn good shape to do all that cycling, walking, yoga and dancing…..kudos….personally, I love exercise. I could watch it all day!😂
      No but seriously, it really assists the body in this process to do physical things that are fun, especially the dancing.

      And yay on the bread and butter. I like eggo waffles slathered with butter and jelly, with a side dollop of goat yoghurt. Mmmmm…and many thanks for reblogging on elizabethsadhu. Love to you dear friend. 🤗💕💕

  9. You are cracking me up!

    I didn’t get into real physical fitness until I was in my early 30’s, although I have always been a dancing maniac. 😀

    I am only DOING what brings me extreme Joy!

    And my recent focus is to throw away what I THINK (or society) I SHOULD look like and focus on BEING strong and Joy filled.

    Love you so much dear Sistar!!

    PS. Waffles or French toast with peanut butter and maple syrup

  10. Yay Elizabeth! Was wondering just this week about you.
    Yay bread and butter!!! And paaaaaaaaaasta……..mmmmmm
    And me too I get tons of exercise–dont have car so I walk everywhere, at least six miles a day, and do an hour of yoga/strength exercise each day, also live on the third floor so lots of stairs! And I eat whatever I want. Although what I want is almost always fruit and veg. Really with all my healthy eating habits and exercise/fresh air I should be easily skinny–but oh well spirit is doing with this body whatever it needs to so I’m just riding along for the time being. I don’t feel like I look particularly bad, I just know what my best feels like and miss that–looking forward to experiencing more and more lightness and ease!!

    PS Maria I sent you a very brief email and wonder if you received it…..

    • Oh my gosh! I love it. Elila!!!! ♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️

      I have actually tried some things to lose weight and it does not have much impact. So, fuck it! Whenever I think about a diet the guides shake their heads a big NO! HEEHEE

      I love connecting here with kindreds.

      I am only 60.75 in 3D Earth years, but actually about 18 in energy…… And 150 in wisdom and learning and healing and growing…….hahaha

      I bet you all can relate, eh?

      I have been creating clothes for myself that make me feel happy and joyful and a bit sexy, but most comfy and joyful! I love re-purposing things I already have……😀😀😀🎶🎶🎶👏👏👏

      Who the heck knows why we each have some extra weight. I know I am a huge Transmuter of energy as an Empath…..I remind myself to press the button and just like a garbage disposal, releasing through me. I used to try and block it but got a real clear message to let it go through and release……😘😘😘😉😉😉

      Thanks for responding Elila!

      Loving me, LOVING YOU ALL!

      E

      • Hello Elizabeth,

        Happy to meet you here on this lovely blog. I too Love love love butter. I make it from cream, when the cream is reduced price, due to end date. Partly because I am not money-flush but mainly cos I love making it! A bit of creativity makes everything lovelier than bought stuff, doesn’t it!!

        What’s odd is that I can FEEL physically fat on one day and FEEL physically slim the next, even though the body is still the same. The comfort and discomfort in the body comes with it. I’ve given up wondering about it, as that never changes it anyway.

        With Love, Gail xxx

        • Gail—–so nice to meet more Sistar Goddesses……….how impressive that you make your own butter…..I bet it tastes super yum! I would probably eat twice as much….heehee…….I don’t know what it is about butter, but I must have A LOT!!!! ha! 🙂 My guides, The Beans, are shaking their pom poms with a big yes (colors for this are yellow and gold). Appropriate and perfect colors they say for BUTTER!!!!!!!!

          They are saying that we NEED butter and we are so smart to not worry that we are eating too much butter……….sometimes I need to eat icecream! FULL FAT, BABY!!!!

          I am so with you on the looking and feeling slim and trim and then feeling and looking like a plump woman………I won’t say fat………..!

          Here here to being a creative bean!……..

          much love and so lovely to meet and connect with all these lovely lovely folks……..

      • Elizabeth–
        LOL LOL you bet your dancing ass I can relate –I am 52 but still end up at the “kids table” at all the family events, but also the old sage! It’s kind of cool because I can relate pretty easily to folks of any age.
        And a giant ME TOO–have tried to lose the weight and NOTHING WORKS. Not even the same things I did to lose it in the past. Not even doing MORE than I did before! I even tried going back to eating 100% raw vegan, which I did for years in Florida and that’s when I was at my slimmest and healthiest–but it was EASY in FL–not something I was doing to lose weight, because I was already slim, but it just kinda HAPPENED, the fruit is just so good there that it ended up being pretty much all I wanted without a conscious “diet”, and it was reinforced by how amazing I felt. Now being in the cold North is another story and the produce is nowhere near what I was used to in FL, but I tried anyway, forced it to try to lose the weight, and nope wouldn’t work. The weight will not BUDGE, no matter what I eat or how much I exercise (even tried running again which again was easy in FL but had to force it here). Which makes it clear to me it’s an ascension thing and it won’t be interfered/messed with haha. Fun! So yep–fuck it for me too! Same message for me about not trying or dieting anymore. Actually it’s the same message about not bothering to work/job anymore! It doesn’t necessarily make logical sense in 3D terms but on some level I know dieting and jobs are history for me–like the whole of my being just says ” NOPE!”. Soooooo, just waiting for the bod and the bank account to catch up to all this lol lol 😝😝😝

        And Gail–yes YESSSS! Feeling slim one day and heavy as hell the next!! One day I can get up the stairs quite easily and the next I feel like I’m hoisting a whole other person with me on my back. But here’s another weird thing–aside from how I FEEL, some days my body actually LOOKS 10lbs slimmer or heavier, and it can change overnight. Quite literally. My body’s appearance can go from looking just fine to looking 8 months pregnant and then back again in a matter of days. It’s wild! (I remember taking pictures for a friend who didnt believe me a few years ago). Also I find that I tend to balloon up near a full moon and then experience relief/bloat reduction right after it peaks. Like right now I’m huge, but by Wednesday I’ll be peeing like crazy and back to more normal appearance, and it’s regardless of what I eat or don’t eat! Talk about a roller coaster! I too have given up–it is what it is and is gonna have its way so as I’ve learned, allow, allow, allow. Might as well as efforting doesn’t even work anymore so why bother? Lol

        Love to you both! 😊💙😊💙😊

        • Elila……………..you are making me laugh, Sistar Goddess!!!!!!! I love connecting with all these Sistars………woooohoooooo!

          I love the synchronicities and it is so wonderful and so affirming and KNOWING we are not alone……..we are not fucking crazy…….which I used to think about 40 years ago, before I figured out a lot of shit, like being an Empath……..as I used to say, I did all the emotions for the whole family. BUT I did not realize it……I just looked fucking nuts! 🙂 A neurotic bean. ha!

          Loving all these connections………it is so wonderful!

          And I like to say, profound allowing……….because that is what is needed, eh? ” I too have given up–it is what it is and is gonna have its way so as I’ve learned, allow, allow, allow. Might as well as efforting doesn’t even work anymore so why bother? Lol”

          I keep hearing the song in my head, row row row your boat, but in my head it is “float float float my boat, gently down the stream..”

          xoxoxoxoxox

          loving me and loving YOU ALL!

          thanks to Sistar Goddess Maria for bringing us together. muah muah muah

    • Elila, yes, I did get your email, and I responded, May 22nd. Weird you didn’t receive it. So I just now re sent it to you. Let me know if you get it.💕

  11. I’ll check in with a big YES to all of the comments, and Elizabeth, this one nails it:

    “I too have given up–it is what it is and is gonna have its way so as I’ve learned, allow, allow, allow. Might as well as efforting doesn’t even work anymore so why bother? Lol”

    I think I gained 10 pounds, lost 5, gained another 10 just reading the comments. Absolutely, nothing is working like it used to… and that applies to everything that used to be part of my life/our lives… big picture, too.

    So, says I… I have everything that I need, but haven’t a clue what I want… because nothing is working like it used to. I keep telling my beloved little buddy…. cat… we’ll be all right, we just don’t know where we’re going and as a result we’re way out of our comfort zone…. it’s all good, just never thought we’d be in the THE BIG ADVENTURE with no ticket to ride… the major WTF! Love to all, B.

  12. So reading all these great comments….I have to agree, there really seems to be this shifting around from day to day on how I feel in my body and even how I perceive my image when I look in the mirror. I can go from looking rather old to much younger than my chronological years. And from slender to heavier. Definitely weird. Shape shifting at its best, or worst. Lol. I think it was true even before the awakening, but seems to be more apparent now.

    • The mirror thing….yes, me too. I sometimes am shocked at how soft and young I look and also at how wrinkly and grey I look at other times. Really I am just shocked at even having a reflection at all!!! The funny thing is, I don’t ever feel as though I look like anything (do you all have this too?) so a reflection is an intrusion into my existence, which doesn’t carry much of an image of myself at all.

  13. Aaaah this conversation is so great! I used to have such intense angst around this subject but now I’m just enjoying connecting with y’all over it and laughing together about it! Just the ridiculousness of it all hahahah.
    I forgot to mention, and I think one of you touched on this, but movement (not heavy exercise) has become required for me as a way to keep these crazy energies moving through and out. If I don’t get out and walk or do some stretching I can FEEL the energies backing up and getting stuck in me–like literally and energetically. It’s like Elizabeth was saying about pushing the (reset) button on the garbage grinder–movement is the button for me to keep things moving along. I don’t even have to talk myself into it anymore cuz I know how crap I feel if I DON’T do it! (One thrilling benefit of this extra weight I will NOT miss is the SWEATING. Good grief I never sweated SO. MUCH. when slender. Only sweat this way when heavy! It’s like hot flashes that don’t end!)
    And Maria yes me too about looking younger and older!! Sometimes its quite startling. Shape shifting, timeline jumping, whatever– it’s weird! Maybe we just look worse in 3D LOL & better/younger/slimmer when we somehow manage to be humming along at our highest vibe….who knows? I do know I always look better after nice walk ☺☺☺
    when I come back from a nice walk.☺☺☺

    • I really agree, Elila, about the movement of our body being important to keeping the energies moving, in whatever way feels good. I also enjoy walking outdoors, especially after dark here in my apt. Complex, because it’s quiet except for the crickets and frogs. Chirping and ribbeting.

      Interesting about the sweating. I have read that sweating is one way we get rid of toxins and release old stuck energies. I go from hot flashes to feeling cold. It’s not unusual for me to put the heat on and within a half hour putting the air conditioning on.

      I know we are in the process of a physical upgrade of these bodies, but meanwhile sometimes I get so tired of driving around in a used car that has passed the 300,000 mile mark.

      • Maria,
        OMG lady, PREACH! I also go from hot to cold all the time. The thermostat on the wall hasn’t changed but this body’s temp is all over the map!!
        And holy shit yes am soooo tired of driving around in the battered worn out car with the shredding tires….this pioneer needs a fresh horse!!!

        And Gail what you say about soft/young to gray/wrinkly is exactly the same for me. And another thing is that over the last 5 or six years I have only taken a few photographs that actually look like me–the rest all look so distorted I don’t recognize myself. I guess it’s similar to what mirrors seem to be doing haha. And in my dreams I can fly and move about easily so yes it’s hard coming back to this body that feels like 1000lbs! Ooooo and very interesting point about allowing vs observing…..hmmm chewing on that!

        Elizabeth– me too I have to carry around a hanky or the dripping sweat gets in my eyes and I can’t see! I have literally had small children see me out walking and ask their moms “why is she all wet like that?”–more than once! Yeesh! I feel like I’m never ” fresh” anymore and worry about smelling funny even five minutes out of the shower lol.The ol’ deo has a hard time holding up to the constant flooding of the pits and I have to carry it with me for petessake…. Good times!

    • Sweating….OMG I can see how it could bring on panic attacks in anxious people, it feels so overpowering!!

  14. Oh my gosh…….so glad you mentioned the sweating, Elila! Sheeee-it……so much fucking sweat pouring off of me that I have never experienced in my life!!!! hahahahahahahaha……I just carry a bandana around when I dance and when I do my exercise class and on a longer bicycle ride.

    I went for many years with pretty much no exercise but now it is one of the things that keeps me sane……….Walking, hiking AND DANCING!!!! Especially………And I have actually been totally getting more into the cycling…..which makes my honey very happy……

    Fun recent confirmation for me: The teacher of the class I take M-W-F is called Better Bones and Balance Accelerated (for older aged folks–not that I claim that! ha) is fun and awesome. She asked me on Friday if I would become a substitute and teach for her when she could not make it. I told her that I don’t want to teach the BBB but my own class which I have been developing over the last several years……I have been waiting for a sign from the Universe for when it is time to teach it. I am laughing to myself right now because at first I kept telling her no, but she kept encouraging me and told me to think about it……laughing because it did not take me much time at all (thought about it while we were stretching) to realize this was a fun opportunity and big time joy for me. I DON’T want to teach full time or even regularly but being a substitute will be perfect for me! Woooohoooooooo!

    I call the class Energize Body, Mind, Spirit. We dance around the room (and laugh) like crazy fun silly humans for about 30 minutes, then do some stretching-yoga ( I used to teach Kundalini Yoga and Zumba) and then end the whole darn fun thing with a mini meditation. (It will partly be a guided meditation intermingled with silence.)

    Anyway, I thought to share this with you all and wish you could be there.

    It felt like a confirmation of me. I have been taking her class for about a year. It is super fun. A lot of the same folks….mostly women aged 45-75…..awesomely joyful and silly and fun.

    Maria-Sistar Goddess—–I AM so with you about ready to get that new vehicle…………….so many miles on this fun thing that has served me so well. But wouldn’t that be fun to get that big upgrade? Wow! Kind of beyond imagining right now, eh?

    What a fantastically beautiful blog and thread this has turned out to be…….I feel some lovely new energies here……..loving it!

    Thanks for being there and listening.

    Barbara–Elila said that about allow allow allow. (sorry for the confusion) ..….and I coined the phrase several years ago, “profound allowing”.

    I love me and I love you all! ❤ ❤

    • Congratulations on your confirmation. It is so good to be validated and appreciated, isn’t it. I’ve just had a lovely confirmation too, Elizabeth. A friend who is an exceptional percussionist who I really admire has asked to become involved in my music album. I am speechless!

      I know what you all mean about allow,allow, allow, but to me it is more like observe, observe, observe. Allowing has a tinge of control, which I am evolving out of.

      Oh, Maria, this vehicle of mine should have failed its last 15 MOT’s!!! I have a different vehicle which I meet in other realms and it feels so sad to come back to this one, yet I still do appreciate it for what it enables me to do and be, here.

      Sistars…..I love that xxx

      • Gail——Thanks and congrats right back at you regarding your music.

        Been pondering the words allowing and observing…..I LOVE how we all use different words and are so unique AND connected.

        For me, allowing feels positive and I AM part of the process and I am observing it all unfold…..and I can take action or not…….it doesn’t feel like control for me…….just BEING and I AM all connected and part of the whole everything. So hard to explain.

        much love to us all!

  15. Maria—love seeing your papa up above. Thanks for sharing that. xoxoxoxox

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