The Mind is Relieved

The nature preserve behind my apartment

I have written a whole lot about the mind in this transformation process of the merging of  human and divine.  And I have written a whole lot about the state of affairs in the world outside our door, and how one parallels  the other.  But this morning I had one of those aha moments about something I wasn’t so consciously aware of.

I realized that I get especially triggered by the government and many citizens in this and other countries attempting to control women’s reproductive rights.  While I am not concerned for myself, since I am no longer in that 3D reality, and I am well past reproductive age, it still angers me.

And the anger is absolutely justified.  It’s a disgrace and an insult to all women.

But it also reflects how I have been feeling about myself.  There is a part of me, let’s say the mind, that wants to control me.  It doesn’t trust my soul to be able to make the best decisions.  It is afraid of being pushed aside, of losing its own status in my life.  It sees the feminine, and my soul as a threat.

And, understandably.  My human mind has been trying to control my life for a really long time.  Just because I came here this lifetime, along with other courageous and capable souls, to introduce a new way of being, a way that no longer makes the mind the epicenter of life, it doesn’t mean I didn’t get caught up in the game like everyone else.

It’s easy to get lost in a mentally oriented world.

All the more reason it’s been really challenging to move into trust of another part of us that doesn’t rely so heavily on that mind to create reality.

So while it’s easy, and let’s admit it, kind of fun to note how people like Donald Trump or (choose any authoritarian leader’s name) and their supporters project, or externalize their own insecurities and unacknowledged issues onto other people, groups, genders, races, and nations, it’s harder to recognize I am doing that to myself.

I have let go of a great deal of my ancestral story, and the old patterns of beliefs and behaviors that go with it, but there are still parts of me in conflict with each other.  That want to barrage me with accusations of not being good enough.  That want to control me through thoughts that are not particularly uplifting.  Thoughts that I am not worthy.  That I don’t make good decisions.

So as I took my walk this morning, I had a little talk with my mind.  I assured it that I wasn’t kicking it out.  That I needed it.  But now it doesn’t have to shoulder all the decisions in my life.  It can actually kick back and relax and enjoy the scenery.

I remember when I was too young to drive, I would enjoy looking out the car or bus or train window as I watched the scenery go by….it was very meditative.

Image Credit


So now, I can enjoy life, smell the flowers, look at the trees and things and not worry that I’m going to drive off a cliff or fall into a precipice.  So, as I was walking in nature and having a compassionate discussion with mind-y, I noticed I began to really relax, and the walk became so much richer.

I was feeling that full-bodied, sensual connection and it felt like I moved into my soul’s presence and my mind happily took the back seat.

It felt like mind-y really appreciated being able to relax.  And that in turn signaled soul-y to come in closer.

Enjoy Left My Old Self Behind

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30 thoughts on “The Mind is Relieved

  1. trickykitty555

    (cackle). The image of the dinosaur in the rearview mirror as you sang “Left my old self behind” …(OMG…WIPING TEARS FROM MY EYES)…ROFLMAO!

    I’m doing the same thing, but that damn T-Rex is running after me…”ROAR!!!” AND ME IN A YUGO!!!


  2. Elila

    Having my own aha moment now! I can literally feel my brain scrambling to wrap around this new perspective. “Control” and “control issues” have been a HUGE theme in this life, people demanding to control me basically since birth and then me struggling to impart my own control in the world to avoid being controlled by others… all seems to boil down to fear again, and I think a lot about how the one thing yeshua said more times than anything else was “do not be afraid”.
    And living too much in my head (escapism and control strategizing), therefore finding it unfamiliar and not so easy to relax in the now. But getting better at it with practice. That’s about all I can articulate for now lol.
    How I love seeing something new or at a new angle–thanks for sharing your insight dear Maria!
    Big hug 💙

    1. So true, Elila….it’s a fear-based world, and moving out of that reality is fraught with resistance from the mind. Because really, the old, human conditioned mind is filled with fear. It’s like, when I slip naturally into that carefree and relaxed state, there is still a part of the mind that goes….”whoa, not so fast, cowboy!” And then it tries to slip in something to worry about.

      But it works less and less and then my mind gets more frantic because I’m not allowing its fears to feed off of me. And like you say, it takes practice. Old habits die hard. And interestingly, then the mind is like, “hmmmm, this ain’t so bad, I can ride this wave.”

    2. Hi Elila,

      You’re right, control has been the primary modus operandus for Humanity. And it is presented as an either/or (duality) of either BE controlled or DO the controlling.

      Nowhere are we brought up to realise that things can still work, happen, be fine, be enjoyable, be fulfilling, etc, without either type of control.

      I remember it was about 15 yeas ago when I had the Aha about control and vowed deeply never to control/dominate or be controlled/dominated. It’s quite a path, realising where we do/have been controlling and controlled, at all levels of our being.

      I feel this is why it is so infuriating and disempowering to feel both controlled by our own minds AND feeling OUT of control OF our ‘own minds’……because we tend to see the mind as part of ourselves, rather than simply a programmable and heavily programmed function/tool ….not much to with US, actually!!

      Bring on the Aha’s, I say….love Gail

      1. Elila

        Maria and Gail–
        It does seem the mind is relaxing it’s grip at times and more amenable to “riding the wave”. What choice does it have at this point lol? We are releasing all the fear, and therefore the need for ideas of control, simultaneously. It’s a hard thing to measure though, at least until you realize at some point that it’s been a bit since you had a mental freak out or panic. Or that I’m just generally more relaxed. And its becoming more obvious and easier to catch when the brain goes in that direction and I can say ahhh there you go again –not today thank-you, and purposely think of something pleasant to break the pattern. Eventually I’m sure I won’t have to even put in that effort when it becomes natural–the practicing will eventually make it automatic I’m assuming. The general fatigue plays a part too as I’m too tired to indulge fear thoughts much. Apathy for the win lol. I’m finding out like you said Gail, that things can and pretty much do work out without all the mental aerobics and that it IS OK to relax! Things usually work out better and in ways I would never have thought of on my own this way.
        Also Gail I read about that same Scottish woman in VegNews mag the other day and thought the same thing. Like perhaps it’s a good thing or an upgrade. According to the article she had no idea anything was different or amiss until she was 65! So she managed all through life unaware. It makes me wonder (suspect) if her family didn’t start feeling the need to “watch her like a hawk” until AFTER her “diagnosis”? When the fear was given a name and placed in front of them. She also said in the article that she uses other senses, like her sense of smell when she’s cooking lets her know if shes burning herself. It seems like to me at least that she’s doing just fine and has developed other ways to keep herself safe. I mean she’s made it this far for petessake!

        1. Thank you for this comment Elila….it has gone very deep!! – ‘The general fatigue plays a part too as I’m too tired to indulge fear thoughts much. Apathy for the win lol. ‘

          D’ya know what, this is SO true, I now realise. I can see how my mind followed it’s programmed patterns to INVENT or extend things to worry about or try to control, but the fatigue actually made it impossible to keep going to the end of the pattern. Thus the patterns become first shorter and unfinished and then eventually broken and finally GONE!!! (certain thought patterns which I used to have I really do not have AT ALL any more. Thank you, fatigue!!!!!))

          I have actually realised deeply that all this awful fatigue, nay… utter exhaustion has probably been my SAVING GRACE!!!!!

          In fact, it may have been impossible without the fatigue, which causes the apathy.

          If I look back I can see that at the beginning I used my mind alot to realise the state and workings of the world, the state of humanity, the state and methodology of our minds, AND the CAUSES of all these things. But once all that realising had been done about external things, THAT was when I started to become utterly exhausted for alot of the time.

          The exhaustion causing us to crash out of thought-streams was what helped me to see my inner patterns. Basically an inner pattern/thought stream began and then ONLY BECAUSE I didn’t have the energy to complete it did I actually SPOT it (due to the dissatisfaction of it being uncompleted!!) Usually a thought-stream gets to completion and we are unaware that we had it, a bit like when we suddenly find that half a pack of biscuits has gone and we only were conscious of eating one biscuit!

          So suddenly I am glad I have been so exhausted as I can see the benefit, the fucking HUGE benefit of it. Thank you so much Elila!!!!

        2. It has also hit me that maybe this is what is all back-to-front about the whole new age scene. They are starting with trying to fix the self/personality, which is nigh on impossible with an active body and an active mind.

          My experience is that we need to see the issues in the world first and recognise the primary modus operandi of control and domination. That realisation only comes AFTER we have faced the external issues, typically women’s oppression, black’s oppression, gay oppression, sex trafficking, corporate dominance, big-pharma, big-farmer, failure to share the worlds’s resources, etc, etc, etc……

          Self investigation before this outer engagement is verging on narcissistic (actually sometimes creating, and definitely attracting narcissists) because it bears no relation to the Whole. The idea of dismissing the external dreadfulness by means of blame (karma, victim-blaming, victim-consciousness, by-passing, etc) or prayer (a quick meditation here, a cosmic group-love-sending there) is rampant in the new age circles, probably because the peoples’ focus has been turned to themselves and there are ready-made excuses to carry on being self-absorbed.

          More disturbing is, that when people DO look outside and question hideous things, the pat new age answer is then that it is all a reflection of themselves and will all get better when they have fixed themselves, and loops right back into fixing themselves and prevents actually engaging with the horrors. And because the horrors ARE horrors, most people are glad to have some validation for not looking too deep and therefore hurting too bad. They can then just hurt about themselves, which they at least feel they may have some control over (not knowing that control is actually the whole bloody PROBLEM!!!)

          So because they are funnelled into narcissistic self-absorption, they never get to the stage of openness which allows the Soul to fully enter, after which the exhaustion comes and our own personal patterns can become revealed, one-by-one.

          Elila, yours has been another unaimed comment which has seriously hit the mark. Thank you so much.

          1. Elila

            Oh my gosh ,Gail–same here with the brain inventing stuff to worry about! And then the exhaustion is what keeps it from continuing to spin an entire “possibility disaster story” and its easier for me to catch it and snuff it because I don’t have the energy to continue it. I have said/thought many times that blessed apathy and the exhaustion are my saving grace. I don’t think I would have lasted this long without them for sure!!!
            As far as looking within or looking without, I was just thinking about a conversation with a friend about how people often see us as “depressed”, and so eager to just apply that label (or any label) and be done with it, when really we are just exhausted with a fucked up world and the ” way things are done” that make absolutely no sense. It’s easier for people to say oh your clinically depressed because labeling it that way means there is something wrong with YOU, as opposed to the REAL problem being that the WORLD is effed up! That’s way too general and too much for most people to comprehend or deal with. If it’s just one person that’s “depressed” well that can be dealt with (& drugged) and seems more manageable than thinking that the whole of humanity needs a serious overhaul (evolution!) lol. The 3D-ers want to just keep doing what clearly doesn’t work and hasn’t worked in way too many years–THAT is the actual definition of crazy! But we who are going for a DIFFERENT way are the crazy/depressed ones hahaha. It’s all so funny if you step back enough to see it. And right there is my other saving grace that has gotten me this far– HUMOR! So much ridiculousness how can we not laugh?

            Love, E

          2. Yes about the depressed thing, Elila. It is not depression, as in clinical, but it is a deeper-than-deep sadness at what we have observed (and experienced) in the World. Hence untreatable other than by blocking-everything-out drugs.

            Humour is the best ‘drug’ we have, free and non-destructive. Keep laughing and chuckling, my friend xxx

  3. Hi everyone, I too have been very consciously chatting with my mind about this hijacking that it does of those conscious things and the unconscious. The silly thing is, it never solves the problems, does it,.. just goes round in circles, saying the same thing over and over..either to us or to others. I love those aha moments when we suddenly spot something previously invisible. Nice one Maria!

    Possibly linked to our evolution, I saw this the other day… about a Scottish granny who feels no pain …..AND no anxiety. The scientists are calling it gene mutation, but I wonder….is it an evolution rather than a problem with a gene (mutations are always seen as negative but maybe they can be evolutionary as well.) Turns out she’s not the only one. Now other people have come forward to say the same…no pain (not sure if they all have no anxiety as well)

    Hello trickykitty555, good to ‘meet’ you here!

    I’ve got a gig with a friend doing meditative music at a fairly high profile festival in Wales in August. And we need to make a vinyl record to sell at the festival. Rather exciting:) I will be doing a song of mine called One-by-One. Once I’ve got a recording together I’ll pass on the link here.

    It seems that everyone is showing their true colours blatantly all over the place. Some news is focussing on Trump unravelling, others on UK government unravelling, people I know are showing their horrible colours so clearly….they don’t even realise it!! Just as Trump and May and all the etc’s are not aware of themselves and how they are presenting themselves to the world.

    Hope you are all doing ok. Can’t be long now, surely, til we can LIVE our truth fully…it’s coming, it’s coming

    Lots of Love, Gail

    1. That’s fascinating about the grandmother, Gail. Great insight about it being evolution.

      Although certain types of pain are actually ways in which we can avoid physical harm, maybe there will come a time when the instincts for avoiding hot stoves etc. will develop. But having said that, the light body is impervious to harm, so it will help to create a physical body that is also resilient.

      But the no anxiety thing, yes, I can see that as we move more into our Embodied enlightenment.

    2. trickykitty555

      Gail! I watched that video (shiver…NOOOOOO). She said her family has to watch rer like a hawk all the time. I can now more clearly imagine what it would be like to be utterly unaware of pain in a world not yet excused from any natural danger by fire, sharp corners…

      But following your line of thought…maybe it is a heralding of what is to come…like, if we all evolved to feel no pain we would be forced to pay more attention (FORCED TO BE MUCH MORE AWARE) of ourselves and each other because if we didn’t we would all die (which is why that person has to be “watched like a hawk”). She lacks an important physical awareness in a physical world. Either she made a mistake and came down too soon…or…if she’s the next step in evolution we better get our care on…really start learning to pay attention to ourselves and each other…and care!

      What IS amazing is that she IS OLD! Her old age is a positive testimony of how, even without anxiety/fear, she must have learned to be more aware…AND her family and friends CARE, too…or she’d likely to have servived childhood.

      Thanks for that video. It is very thought provoking, and so was what you said!!🙏🏼👍🏼🤩

      1. I wonder if it is that we will become super-aware or that danger will not exist in the same way. I mean, can one burn or crush a light-body? If it’s to be a light body that we live in, of course. I know the huge difference between my awareness of what is around me and the awareness of others – it still astonishes me how people can be so unaware of things and people and dangers around them. So if my/our already-higher environmental awareness were to become much huger, third-eye-like, maybe we could live safely in a “dangerous” environment.

        Who knows? Not me, but hey-ho, I’ve become good at wait and see (lack of Control Elila, yay!!)

        1. trickykitty555

          Those same musings came to my mind, too Gail. I dunno. I think either is possible, and so are both possible….even more than these, too.

          I can’t really speak to light bodies because I spent most of my conscious life (from the time I can remember and not to be confused with enlightened because I can’t claim that title) just trying to get grounded in being human. THAT HAS BEEN REALLY HARD.

          For me, I think it’s fine to just be the forerunner; late arrival. I think that really is my calling. We prepare for what’s to come…and that job is pretty general. Specifically, I think I work mostly with Neutrality…neutralizing elements because more can come in when things are not persuaded more one way or another….so that no one aspect of physical reality gets…locked in by the mind because in reality, creation has no particular limits…no boundary.

          It is ironic that it is through the mind that we visualize possibilities; we “See” that in the mind (the vision of it is made subjectively real). That’s quite a power!

          Human beings are still very much in the mind that is ego, and through that…the creative aspect of what we make is so raw and untamed. We are as destructive as we are procreative….for now. But like you said before…”don’t look in the mirror.”

          Rather…let’s look out the window….or just get outside like Maria talked about and shared so freely…rather watch miracles unfolding in creation then just at myself in a mirror all the time…as fascinating as that can be sometimes especially when it is the mirror that is fractured and not me. LOL

          What is in store for man…is not yet occurred, and there is no promise of anything. But there is hope, potential for the highest ideals which we talk about. There is our will and gumption to do make what we see in the mind very real.

          And still there are not enough among us all that makes OUR will unified (and I don’t grudge free will choice…nor do I fear it)…and then there is our waking up which so many are doing…waking up to the light.

          The mind gets locked in, and I’m so glad you guys and Maria are talking about “Care free” and joy. I’m really super duper glad there is this place here that shines a collective light that is strong and helps other people wake up to a greater vision.

          For now, I am physical. My alternate non-physical super power is probably the mental field, so I can’t hate on the mind too much. But other people work with other elements of our existence and purpose here. I do not grudge or envy them, but I greatly admire them…greatly esteem any that use their talents to propel us forward, and if that talent is discovering the practical application of the light body in our evolution or ascension…I wanna hear about it because it’s interesting and not disassociated from what I do…in fact, I wanna start figure out how they relate…THATS what fascinates me most in this life; seeing how everything fits and harmonizes.

          Love you all…and much gratitude to you all

          1. ‘ I spent most of my conscious life (from the time I can remember and not to be confused with enlightened because I can’t claim that title) just trying to get grounded in being human. THAT HAS BEEN REALLY HARD.’

            And isn’t the real bummer that once we get the hang of being human we have to lose the hang of it again, cos we can see how damaging it is/was and how actually UN-human it really all is.

            Now I’m making real strides in not behaving like a ‘normal’ human, not believing like a ‘normal’ human, not existing like a ‘normal’ human.

            It bloody better not switch back again!!!!

          2. trickykitty555

            OMG AND ROFL (again)!!!! GAIL! The magic never ends here today for me! When I finished responding to you, “My Mind” took me on another vision of the future, and there was this narrative (I have a WONDERFUL NARRATOR), and he was saying, “In the future, how human kind is now will be considered mentally ill (the actual word that was used was “Retarded,” but that’s not a PC word anymore…but the word means “slowed down,” So the word it’s self has an accurate and specific meaning).

            So…by all means, stay ahead of the curve, Girrrrrrl!,, OMG! Obviously you are a forerunner too. Let your light shine! Absolutely!!!

          3. trickykitty555

            I read it and left a response. You have a clear and intuitive way of reasoning which I really like.

            I’ve spent a lot of my life bypassing “Truth” as far as what I believe and what others’ believe. I get pretty reactive is someone actively tries to undermine my way of moving through the world with my…understanding of things. I’m very “live and let live.” I’d consider myself a principled hu-man (LOL). I live by principles (not truths…the word sorta makes me uncomfortable these days…Truth is not flexible in an every changing world where rules always change).

            Anyway…I really enjoyed the article.

  4. Barbara

    As I read your article, Maria, the vision came up of walking into, let’s say a Walmart, and you’re looking for only one thing, but you’re not quite sure in which department it might be. There’s no one to ask, so you start the search by yourself. You’re getting tired, angry, frustrated, even sad, about to give up, but then all of a sudden you find what you’re looking for and realize that all those other places your mind took you to and you followed hoping to find that thing, you were being told, “That’s not my department.” Now this is particularly challenging for women, because we have a tendency to feel guilty that we are not looking enough/caring enough and unless we do, then we have to settle for second best or at the very least, a facsimile. No, I want the REAL thing regardless of what my mind-y has in mind! Love, B.

    1. I love the Walmart analogy, Barbara. That resonates with me. So interesting you say, that’s not my department. Because more and more I find myself saying ‘that’s not my problem’ in reference to various things, like other people’s situations, other people’s frustrations and even my own mind’s.

      The not caring enough thing, as women, especially, is on its way out.

      And YES to, we want the REAL thing!

      1. trickykitty555

        T-Rex a’chasin’ me in my broken down and barely running Yugo, and still about certain things, I’ve got the breaks and gas both being pressed at the same time (T-Rex….”ROAR” behind me….so close its fogging the rear window!)

        IM LAUGHING SO HARD IN MY MIND, because as this image keeps asserting itself, Maria…I’m hearing you keep saying, “women” need to care less (breaking an unhealthy conditioned responsiBility they’d been shouldering), and here I am in my “Mind” saying…BUT BUT BUT CARE IS SO IMPORTANT!

        Our roles, it seems are reversed, for I am a man (taking my foot off the break and pressing harder on the gas) who really believes in caring!

        And I don’t grudge anyone (woman or man) for telling people that shove all their crap off on other people “Kick rock! Skidaddle….on your way, heathen!!!”

        Thanks for the insight, M’dear! Now…I need to get beyond this T-Rex. It’s freaking me out!

        It’s ok for women to not hate themselves for not giving a crap about other people’s messes. By all means!

        And it’s is ok for men to start caring more about the messes that are made…and start taking care of business to help make it right because they Do and can care about every one around them just as greatly as women have done in the past and still do (baring any individuals in either sex that don’t care at all…
        Boo to them)

        I hope you agree that duty to self, done well, is duty to all. THAT is enough to be getting on with!

        Love what you are saying.

        1. Well said, T.K. It’s heartening to hear that the male gender is shifting to a more compassionate (not to be confused with sympathetic) state of consciousness. From a very mental to a more sensual way of being.

          And actually I have seen that happening more and more over the years. Men are more and more involved in the rearing if their children, and are ok with expressing their softer emotions. Their hearts are opening like never before. And I am especially proud of those of the male gender, people like you, who have been bringing in the new consciousness. A balanced consciousness, in which the masculine and feminine work in co-operation with one another, support one another and express that a myriad of ways. 💜

      2. There are now so many ‘departments-that-are-not-my-problem’ that I can’t any longer go into I might starve……but yes, starve myself of all the CRAP in those various departments. Just this little department here and a couple of others seem to be enough for me. Maybe all this starvation will lose me some weight….haha

  5. trickykitty555

    Yeah for balanced consciousness for all ( Looking Down at my feel, only I’m not walking care free as in your video…I’m still heading there in my Yugo but got A’piphany in m’pocket…”Break and gas alternately…not at the same time. Gas for T-Rex to get smaller in the side mirror, and break when I get to “Care-free.” (Wink)…got it 🙌🏼👌🏼😂


    Loved that video!

    You a good!

      1. trickykitty555

        OMG! See how the mind is? I recently was inspired to consciously focus my mind else where when I get realllllly pissed off which had been my numero uno priority during my mid-life (enter pissed off T-Rex). LOL. The ego of the mind was working over time to do its job…protective defense. But…you know…I’m just me…this human man, and THAT T-Rex (domesticated but wild as all hell) started mistaking me for its next meal (Bad bad Dino…BAD!!)

        Now…who’d have thought that by your words, I’d have been reminded AGAIN…after just being reminded that I have the choice to not look in the rear view Mirror???!

        GAIL! Thank you so much! You literally answered my pray of this morning…”Lord, help me not look to my painful past so I can look forward only with the wisdom and not the woe.”

        To you, Gail, Much thanks….and Amen.


        1. Glad it spoke to you!! I love how our un-aimed comments can really hit someone’s mark. It seems to happen here quite often. Maria holds a safe space here…so great things can happen!!

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