We have this skewed idea that our human self is filled with imperfections. And that the spirit part of us is all-knowing, patient, and is socially fluid, knowing just what to say, and when to say it. There is a concept that we become these flawless beings, both physically and energetically, as we ascend. Continue reading
There are some major misconceptions circulating about the embodied enlightenment and ascension process. The biggest being that we are moving into a perfected state of light and love. Sure, there’s a lot of both light and love, but that’s not truly what this transformation is about.
Trust is what we are going for in our awakening. Trust in ourself first, and then in life. Trust in our divine nature. Trust in our decisions. Trust that even though we are confined to these human bodies, we are, at our core, actually free. Trust doesn’t come easy. We’ve had a history of trusting only to have our hearts broken and our heads…well you know. How can we trust ourselves considering we have made so many, what we consider, mistakes? we’ve hurt ourselves and others. How can we trust ourselves or anyone else considering in this awakening many of us have lost jobs, relationships, money and health, not to mention our very identity.
The Greatest Story Never Told
The being we refer to as Jesus was a teacher to his core, but he didn’t become so that easily. He went through so many trials of the heart in his lifetime to get to the place of ascended master. and he doubted himself every step of the way. He kept second guessing himself, thinking he was making mistakes. He was also human, and was susceptible to the human condition of self-doubt.
This is also our story. In my own life I have spent countless hours, days, weeks, month, years searching, looking for the secret, for the answer to this human dilemma, trying to find some kind of peace within. What I discovered was that after so much searching I never really did find myself, not in the human sense. It seemed like there was never an end to the unlayering, the processing, the healing of issues. After a while it felt hopeless.
Then I shifted my perspective a little, and saw that I really wasn’t here to perfect myself, to become this untainted, pure, glowing entity of such high vibration that I became like one of those angels on christmas cards. No, it’s not why we are here, and it’s not what the ascended masters of the past were doing either!
So it’s not trusting that we will become this idealized version of Jesus or Buddha or any other ascended master of the past. It’s really more about trusting that we are perfect just as we are right now. We are angels having a human experience, and we are inviting our soul, our spirit right into these very human bodies.
I am learning to trust my instincts. I know things. I feel things. I sense things. (sound familiar?) That part I got down. It’s the trusting part I am working on. I sense when something feels right. I’m learning to take action on that feeling. I Intuit when something feels wrong, or unbalanced. Often I would go ahead and take action anyway even when it didn’t feel right. It could have been because of an inner fear that if I didn’t I would become financially broke or not loved. But now in this new energy, which is very present and very potent, I can’t get away with doing that.
When I ignore my instincts or feelings about something, it will kick my butt! I will pay for choosing to ignore my inner guidance. Can’t seem to get away with it any more. I’m speaking of things that compromise my integrity or go against my inner core values, that sense of self-love. To others it may seem silly, why not celebrate the holidays, but what if it just doesn’t feel joyful to me? Maybe it will next year, but right now I prefer to rent a bungalow on the beach and just be with myself. So not trusting ourselves has consequences in a speeded up vibrational environment.
To thine own self be true
There’s an interesting dynamic happening: When we ask for more trust, the universe (well, it’s actually us) delivers to us a situation to test the new desire. Some challenge to our trusting ourselves more. It may be in the form of a relationship, money issue, or just deep emotional trauma from our past surfacing.
Recently I made a decision to move on from two relationships that no longer resonate with me and in which I played a care taking role. (A woman I’ve known for over a decade and an elderly man ). I struggled with the decision…feeling obligated to continue on the one hand, but on the other I was getting physical evidence that it was actually bad for me. So my doubt manifested in both people yelling at me and telling me that I was abandoning them. Wow. I felt angry, incensed, and guilty all at once. I pondered, maybe they were right. Maybe I was being selfish. Maybe I should continue the relationships
My decision to move on was being tested. My doubts were being mirrored back to me. Maybe, I pondered, I should just focus on the good qualities in them both, and make myself available energetically for them, as I always had. Maybe I can just shift my role in the relationships and thus change the dynamic of those relationships. Wow, now it was getting pretty ‘heady.’
In my heart moving on just felt like the right thing for my own well being. For my own joy. Whatever the justification. So I decided to keep that commitment to myself as long as it felt right for me.
Trust in self is not easy. It’s not for the faint of heart. It’s knowing something without any concrete evidence. I am finding it a little easier as I gain confidence in my decisions. It’s not even about making the right decision, just the one that feels best in the moment. So much of our lives have been about making decision based on fear. What will others think? What if I won’t have enough money? What if it just doesn’t work out?
The decision to release the relationships came with a set of fears: What if I am breaking his heart and abandoning my other friend (But his heart was already broken, and my friend already abandoned herself a long time ago). What if I am all alone and don’t know what role to play now?
So dear friends, it’s time to stop over thinking all of this. It’s actually a simple formula: If it feels good to you (to all of you, your body, mind and soul) then it’s good for you. I would even go as far as to say then it’s a divinely guided decision. And if something feels unbalanced, or if you simply do not want to do something, please do not talk yourself into it if possible.. And if you check it with your divine self and human self, you will never do anything to hurt another. If you are reading these words, you are at the point of balance of your masculine and feminine, and you will not intentionally harm another. If they feel hurt, it’s about them, not you. And it’s actually a gift to them so that they too can find the god within.
I realized that I had been very hard on myself, thinking I had to be perfect. The perfect friend, the perfect spiritual teacher. Well, I’m getting past that, and I’m recognizing that the ascension process is a bitch. That’s right, it’s not easy. It tears apart everything we thought was sacred. It pushes us out of our comfort zone. It shatters the illusions we held near and dear. It ruins our relationships, or rather exposes them for what they really are.
It doesn’t mean that we as friends can’t come back together at some point more balanced. Because I was playing an imbalanced role in the connection too with both of them – the role of care-taker.
Our human selves can never really recognize the magnificence of our divine, god-selves, nor can our human selves recognize the beauty of our humanness, but the good news is, our divine selves can do both.
So, fellow pioneer of the new energy, why not begin to really trust yourself?
One thing I discovered being a musician and artist is that a work of art or music can be technically perfect but can lack real ‘soul.’ That the so-called imperfections sometimes are what make the work unique and relatable to other humans.
One of the biggest illusions, the greatest lie going, is that you must strive to ‘Be Spiritual.’ That you have to perfect yourself before you can ascend. That you have to display certain characteristics, heal certain issues, act a certain way, be always loving, forgiving, and patient for example before you can receive your enlightenment. That you must strive for this ideal.
If that is what you embrace, then by law of attraction you will continue to ‘strive’, or search for yourself and your enlightenment. In an earlier post entitled, “Perfectionism in Spirituality” I explained that the Masters of the past were also human, and displayed idiosyncracies, but stories were passed down throughout time that they were perfect, saintly beings. Nothing could be further from the truth.
Once they stopped trying to perfect themselves, and accepted all of their humanness, they became enlightened.
But then our society holds up impossible to attain images of the ‘perfect’ body, the ‘perfect’ lifestyle, and our religions teach us that we are ‘imperfect’ beings who need forgiveness. So it’s no wonder that we carry these concepts over into the spiritual arena. What happens when we beat ourselves up for not being this perfected spiritual being is that we pull in past memories, from this or other lifetimes where we believed we had done something less than ‘good.’ We actually believe that we have to heal or transform the event. But the problem with that is we are not our past. We are spiritual beings having human experiences. Period!
Our soul took the wisdom from the experience, yes. But it is not who we are or who we continue to be unless we choose that. One of the most difficult things to wrap our minds around is that we are perfect exactly as we are.
Instead we push ourselves to become better human beings, better spiritual beings. It’s exhausting. It’s a waste of time. Enlightenment is just a breath away. There are no courses you need to take, no books you need to buy, no rituals you need to practice. That can become a bit of an addiction, a distraction. Because do you notice that there’s always one more cd to buy, one more channelled message to read, one more issue to resolve? Where does it end? When will it be done?
What is actually happening in the process of ascension is we are recalibrating our bodies and minds to a faster vibration in order to embody our spirit, here in this lifetime, on this planet. And as this happens we will be releasing patterns of thinking and being that no longer serve this end. But that being we are beginning to embrace isn’t necessarily one who walks on water, or parts the seas, walks around curing the sick, or sprouts wings and a halo.
It’s not necessarily someone who cares about saving an endangered species or the soul of his fellow-man. It’s actually someone who doesn’t care much about anything in particular.
You will probably lose interest in the ‘new age’ altogether.
You will probably have less and less interest in ‘making things happen’, or fix anything.
You will become more grounded, more peaceful in the full understanding that all is well, and that all your needs will be met easily.
You will walk around in a knowingness that everyone else is just where they need to be, and you’re not trying to prove to them or yourself that you know something they don’t.
As you move out of linear time you will realize that your enlightenment already happened, so there’s no anxiety about it.
One of the hardest things to get over is the concept that ’tis better to give than to receive.’ Because if you are wanting to become enlightened, to remember who you really are, you need to get over that one! Because the foundation of the new energy is about receiving. It’s about receiving the abundant energies available to you in order to create your desires. You can’t give those energies to anyone else, it goes against the laws of the universe. It simply will not work.
In fact, it’s being a bit arrogant. it’s saying that others are weak, that they are incapable of creating for themselves. And even if you tried to give it to them, it simply wouldn’t work.
But you are giving to them by your example, by being a living, breathing example of someone who loves themselves enough to create with the abundant energies available to EVERYONE.
You are also a living, breathing example of someone who accepts themselves, and all their so-called imperfections. Someone who knows that they are a creator god embodied in the human experience.