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For those awakening divine humans

Letting Go of Being Uncomfortable


Audio file for Letting Go of Being Uncomfortable

As odd as it sounds, it seems that being uncomfortable is what you would call our ‘go-to’ strategy if we don’t want to participate in something, if we don’t want to be involved with something out of a feeling of obligation, or a duty to someone outside of ourselves:  family member or loved one, anything like that.   It seems like it’s more acceptable to just not feel well, to say we don’t feel well, or actually get sick, have a minor accident. In worst-case scenario, if we repeat this pattern over years we can find ourselves coming down with some fatal disease or getting a major heart attack. These are patterns that have been deeply entrenched in us for a long, long time.  As a human race we’ve been conditioned to feel uncomfortable, to feel like the victim of outside circumstances, people, even victim of our own emotions.

What would your life look like if you had a choice, which you do, to not do something… say you decide not to celebrate the holidays, any one of the holidays.  Whether it’s Christmas, Hanukkah, Easter, Thanksgiving, even your birthday… if you can imagine THAT.   Could you give yourself permission to do that if it felt joyful to you?   And to do that without any excuse?  Without having to feign illness or actually get sick?

I finally gave myself permission after, well I would say decades of time of going through the motions of the holidays, to finally not get involved in Christmas and Thanksgiving, without guilt, without getting sick, without having an accident.  Even though there was some fallout from it.  I got a little bit of guilt thrown my way.   But I said to myself,  I’ll live with that, but I prefer to choose what I want in the moment and to be loyal to that choice. I realize that I am not of the world anymore. I am here. I am enjoying life but now on my own terms, and what could be sweeter?  And I certainly am not here to fulfill anyone else’s expectations of me. And really, no matter what they tell you, they do have expectations.  It’s natural.  It’s natural in a world of duality where most people are looking outside themselves, whether they recognize that or not, they do have expectations.

And for the most part it seems to work for people… not so well in the new energy.

So we begin to feel more and more detached from that old role we’ve been playing, of being accommodating and doing things that don’t really bring us joy, out of the feeling of obligation.  As we move away from that and understand that we can choose in each moment how we want to feel and what we choose to do, there is a bit of a void in that place.  That makes us uncomfortable to a certain degree because we’re just not used to that space. it’s getting beyond that old role and now into a totally new expansive space.

So let’s explore this new space together.  You’re more and more removed from the energy of others, from the mass consciousness, from the drama that’s going on in the world, and even to a certain degree removed from the drama going on within your own mind… which renders you a bit bored. There’s less passion. We can say drama gave the sense of passion to us, a sense of connecting, a feeling.   Drama is the mind’s way of feeling, because we are still in that space of…connecting to our soul is a whole new space for us so that will and does provide us with feeling.  With a deep feeling  and a feeling of joy. And feeling you could call passion, but not from a place of drama.  And there is a difference.

It’s a feeling of being alive and enjoying being alive.  Being aware of our divinity.  It’s a whole new space for us so naturally that’s going to feel a bit uncomfortable.  Because we have been addicted to feeling uncomfortable, so why not continue that feeling of discomfort even through this process? It’s sort of an old pattern.  So letting go of discomfort, letting go of feeling victimized by energies within us and outside of us, that’s a process and it’s OK.   The entire world is playing victim in one form or another.  They’re not consciously aware that they are, some are, some aren’t.  But they’re in the victim mode continuously. That feeling of being uncomfortable is almost brought to a fine art. That’s what we are moving out of and you notice that as you move away from drama you sometimes pull it right back in because it’s very familiar.  It’s the way humanity has been doing business for eons of time.  In fact even our literature is called DRAMA, isn’t it?   It’s acceptable.  It’s believed to be part of life.  There’s got to be a challenge or a hurdle, something to overcome.   We see it in our sports.  We see it in the media.  We see in our literature. We see it everywhere.  It’s family… family drama… and it’s everywhere.  It’s all-encompassing at times.

So here we are in this brand-new space.  No obstacles to overcome.  No challenges.  No setbacks.  No issues to analyze and process, no playing victim or victor anymore.   Well then what’s next?  Is the game over?  Am I out of this game called life?  And of course it does feel good to be out of that game because wasn’t that game exhausting?  And on the other hand there’s an emptiness about life now to a certain degree because we can’t seem to get engaged the way we want to be.  It’s a little disconcerting.  But that’s just a temporary space.   We still hold those victim energies to a point and that’s OK.   Again, this has been going on for eons of time. So we need to honor that this has been our journey.  This new space is a bit of a scary place to step into.  It feels so unknown.  But we are pioneers of the new consciousness are we not?   We’re always stepping into the unknown.  In fact, it’s on our business card isn’t it? Our business card reads:

                               New Consciousness Pioneer

                                  Explorer of the Unknown

                           Pattern-Buster – Willing to Travel

You remember that business card?  That’s on your business card.  That’s on my business card.  And it’s a wonderful business to be in, this new consciousness love affair with ourselves.

copyright © 2015, Maria Chambers, All rights reserved. Please feel free to share this content with others, post on your blog, your Facebook page, etc, but maintain this article’s integrity by including the author and source website link: Maria Chambers at

Author: soulsoothinsounds

Our lives are like great paintings or great pieces of music. If we focus on all the technical 'imperfections' we will miss the true beauty of the work. We won't see, or rather, FEEL the essence and spirit of the masterpiece. I no longer identify myself as a writer, artist, or musician. Rather I express my divinity, and my humanity through the media of art, music and writing. I began this blog because I wanted to give voice to my experiences and insights, and I wrote for myself primarily. Eight years later, I am still writing for myself, and I am discovering that my experiences are not personal but universal - galactic even. And now I am more sure than ever that I am a new consciousness teacher, as each of you are. The way we teach is by going through the very human experiences, and as we ascend and shed our old selves, with love, and as we embody spirit in this lifetime, which we are all doing, we become the standards for others of the new divine human.

35 thoughts on “Letting Go of Being Uncomfortable

  1. Thank you Maria! So right on and so encouraging! I can really relate! Blessings to you on this Beautiful and brave and sometimes uncertain journey we are on!

  2. thank u Maria ❤

    good gracious, i've been in suuuuch an uncomfortable space lately… being super aware of the victim energy and how/where i'm still holding it and experiencing it, but still not knowing how to completely shed it.

    i've phased myself out of the busy of social life enough that the guilt from not taking part in things eased off a good year or so ago. but even after i've disconnected from the social obligations, i still seem to have so many of those situations that try to pull me into that kind of "being accommodating" energy that creates that same sort of guilt. i do see how all of these situations when i end up the "over-accommodating guilt-ridden victim" are all about lack of energy balance for me… i can see that it's me absorbing it when others are forcing their energy on me, or me allowing it when others are taking energy from me… but knowing and feeling and manifesting who i truly am within myself enough to establish that balance, that sure is a work in progress still.

    i always feel like there is no "right action" in these kinds of situations because i'm darned if i do, and don't if i don't most times, and i end up feeling guilty no matter what… i needed this article to remember it's not about preventing or trying to control the outside circumstance, and that it's about learning to be ok in this uncomfortable space. part of letting go of the victimhood and guilt role is to stop beating myself up for the victimhood and guilt huh 🙂

    • Exactly sweet pea! It’s being o.k. with it. We have been so hard on ourselves and that is what we are in the process of releasing. And it is a relief to know we don’t have to try to figure out how to release it. But I will say this, allowing our soul to be in our body with us makes it so much easier. I used to be such a people pleaser years ago. But now, sometimes I find the words just coming out of my mouth and saying to someone at the cafe I need my space. Because it comes down to I want to feel good, and sometimes that means not sitting with someone who wants to sit with me. As women especially, we are in the process of releasing our caretaking roles. And, that even extends to just not allowing any energy even those energies within us to feed off of us. This goes beyond women’s liberation that we know of. It goes to the heart of true freedom. It’s the freedom to feel safe enough within ourselves, to love our selves, and then to feel that Safety with in the world. But these things take time. Compassion for ourselves is of the utmost importance

      • Yes Ma’am,
        Walking around in this space and talking with agitated people feels like carrying
        a big stack of delicious pizzas in a room full of hungry kids.
        They WILL take every bit of it if they can 😀
        (and will pile with their ‘homework’ instead :p)
        and its our job to not let them have this way,
        so they can learn to do their own homework,
        and get as many pizza as they want themselves.

      • Yes Ma’am,
        Walking around in this space and talking with agitated people feels like carrying
        a big stack of delicious pizzas in a room full of hungry kids.
        They WILL take every bit of it if they can 😀
        (and will pile you with their ‘homework’ instead :P)
        and its our job to not let them have this way,
        so they can learn to do their own homework,
        and learn to get as many pizza as they want themselves.

  3. yes! that all speaks to me so perfectly. thank u Maria, you always have such a perfect understanding ❤

    and this lol…

    "…even those energies within us…"

    today i stopped and had the thought…. "what if i chose not to beat myself up about this?" and the idea that i could just choose to not feel guilty about it was so weird!! haha

  4. lol aayas! yup, that pizza analogy pretty much sums it up 😀

    my heart so so dreams of a universe where we all are full and whole with our own beautiful energy, and we fully respect each others energy, and our connections are no longer about taking, needing, using, depending, controlling, manipulating, or dumping weight, but about celebrating and honoring… connections where energy is free and pure and flows and grows and shines. ❤

    • sweet pea, yes to all of that!!!

      And of course, because we are in the forefront of this change, we will to a certain degree feel uncomfortable in a world. that for the most part is still unconscious. We will still be feeling the energies of those we live alongside of. But the difference being that the master does not react to those energies. Most people would think that statement doesn’t even make any sense. They would say, “of course we react to things. What choice do we have? My daughter causes me such heartache. My boss makes me so angry. I’m depressed because I have________” But that’s where we as the awakening ones can be the examples. accepting our human-ness, being aware of those heavier feelings, and choosing to feel joy despite circumstances.

      But it does get better and better, easier and easier…and I love your expression, “celebrating and honoring…connections where energy is free and pure and flows and grows and shines.” Thank you. ❤

      • yes Maria ❤ and oh my, the layers we go through of learning to not react. i thought had it good and figured when i learned to stop reacting to things outwardly, but now i'm seeing how most of the reaction is actually in my own messy head! i have this horrible anxious need to try to problem solve and obsessively think about things and analyze it and sort it and probably the worst thing i do.. try to be prepared for the negative consequences that maybe might come… ugh… putting that bunch of habits down and learning to just let it be… that's where the real mastery is huh? haha

        i'm where Elila is at and haven't got any bit towards "joy" yet, but have found the positive place i can choose go to instead of a negative spiral is just "neutral"… i guess it's sort of a calm, peace, and trust kinda place. no matter if things are how i wish they were right now, i am safe, i am worthy, i am loved.

        • sweet pea, what you are describing is what the mind does…analyze, problem solve, worry, and that’s why it’s so lost in this transformation because we are letting go of using our mind to do what it really couldn’t do for us…and that place of neutral you describe is perfect. It’s also a place of the master. Because our soul, our spirit isn’t just all about ecstasy and bliss. I believe we are moving out of the mind’s emotions and into the soul’s feelings…that’s why we are feeling detached. It’s a healthy detachment…and what we would call neutral as you said. We are doing so well….big pat on the back to all of us!!!

  5. Maria,
    I too have over the years systematically extricated myself from all the social & obligatory hubbub (which is all just drama anyhow–at least in my family!). I now participate in only the events that sound like fun to me. I laughed right out loud when you suggested that perhaps one would not even want to celebrate ones own birthday…..”….if you can imagine THAT” –!! Thats exactly how i felt about my recent milestone birthday, and i chose to have a simple quiet supper & a DVD with my sister, niece, & mother, & i cooked it myself so that i could have exactly what i wanted! I felt almost like i got away with something LOL, not having to endure some torturous affair initiated by others feelings of obligation or desires.
    I am still however still waiting on that feeling of “being alive & enjoying being alive”. I have longed for such a feeling for most of my life. Its kind of all i wish for anymore, along with vibrant health, ease, & delight! Actually they are not merely wishes, but what i feel i absolutely NEED, like air & nourishment, to continue living.
    Here’s to spending the holidays (& all days) exactly as we wish!!!

    • Elila, congrats on doing what you want without guilt!!! The feeling of being alive and enjoying being alive will come, and I’m sure you are practicing it in some ways already…’vibrant health, ease and delight’ ARE ‘as important as air and nourishment.’ Some in the spiritual arena will try to convince us that our human needs should take a back seat to our spiritual ones….but we are discovering that it’s ALL spirit. That the relationship between our human self, (our body and our mind), and our soul is becoming more intimate. It’s why our life seems at times to be in such chaos. Having to let go of all the stuff that resists the joy. Our body and soul are literally melding and the outcome won’t be anything less than brilliant health and a deep love of life. Thanks for sharing your energies here. ❤

      • yes Maria, i love this! like so many of us, my health and physical being have been the hardest struggle. yes! it’s ALL spirit! that’s why we crave the healing and wholeness so so much… it’s a true soul level craving. i’ve tried to just accept this physical state of illness and pain and struggle, and my heart just can’t, it truly just. can’t. i still struggle with giving myself permission to want the health and physical wholeness, i have all those old limiting messages in my head of it bein’ vanity or superficial or too focused on the physical… but it’s truly not… it’s our spirit and body wanting to be whole, and yes becoming more intimately connected to each other. thank you for sharing that, it feels so good to have a place to honor those feelings about it ❤

        • I’m on board with you sweet pea, the body is the hardest hit. And often it’s the last to catch up with our consciousness. And because of that we can get discouraged and lose confidence in ourselves and this process. You speak for many of us who still ask ourselves if it’s so necessary to have our body on board. Especially since traditionally in spiritual practices the body was denounced as a distraction in the search for ‘god.’ Just as were worldly goods. So it’s accepting that the body is going through a major transformation. Your words are perfect, “it’s our spirit and body wanting to be whole…”

          Absolutely our body wants that love and wholeness……and it is responsive to whatever state of consciousness we are in. So it’s to relax, trust, allow…….and don’t forget the chocolate.

      • Wow Maria, i got tears in my eyes reading your response, i really felt the comfort, support & reassurance in it–thank you. And sweet pea, your words really resonate too. Just today i received in the mail a new drivers license for a state i never wanted to live in again, and that along with the truly frightful photo on it (it IS a drivers license after all, and they are all taken with a funhouse distortion lense on the camera to be sure) threatened to pull me into the depression. And due to an ice storm i couldnt even walk it off!! But i CHOSE to go to that neutral zone you spoke of, where its not necessarily bliss & joy, but its not giving into a downward spiral either! And i also know how it feels to feel really awkward in a body that is not reflecting vibrant health or beauty the way im so certain it “should” be, or hopefully will be, if that makes sense. I feel like i should really be at my most lovely, glowing really, experiencing AND displaying that vibrant health, but my body hasn’t caught up yet & it can make so many things feel off & uncomfortable & just…..yucky! And it really challenges my confidence at times! But i really do believe that Maria is correct when she says its all coming. ☺️☺️☺️

        PS thank you so much Maria & commenters here for the soothing feeling of community, understanding, & support i always find here 💙💙💙

        • There was only one drivers license photo of me I actually liked, i mean i was stunned because historically they were pretty scarey and when I had to renew the license I wanted to paste the photo onto the new one! Oh well….but the rule of thumb is to never judge our attractiveness by our ID photo or drivers license. 😀. And as women we tend to be hypercritical of our looks anyway as we see the rediculous standards of beauty paraded in front of us. But we are beautiful because we are shining our light more and more, and others recognize it even if we can’t just yet! And yes, it does undermine our confidence at times to not feel comfortable to be in a body that is not where we want it to be, especially with pain and illness…which is why it’s so important to remember that these imbalances are showing up because of the love that we are beginning to give ourselves. They want to feel that love. They will be transformed in the process. And its o.k. to feel all the emotions around them. And as you said, then choose to not react to those feelings as your truth…go to the neutral zone as you said…And yes it is nice to have such a loving community of kindred souls.💟💟💟

  6. yes ❤ and such a comfort to just honor those feelings 🙂

  7. And aayas, i agree with everyone else–the pizza analogy is brilliant and spot on!

    • Elila, i understand how you feel so so much, it makes me just wanna hug you because i get it so much. 🙂

      that uncomfortable yuckiness with our physical beings is so much more than a superficial feeling… it’s like homesickness for who we truly are :\ and it’s so hard to share that feeling about it all because what Maria said is so true in how it’s looked at as a distraction to spirit. i feel like there are some of us for who that physical stuff is not only not a distraction, but it’s an essential part of our journey. so those positive thinkin’, spiritual change in perspective types of things don’t bring us peace… cause they’re not meant to. i don’t quite know how to explain this right, but i feel like some of us are so unshakably hellbent in the desire for the physical health, vibrancy, beauty, wholeness stuff, because manifesting what we ache for in those places has incredible purpose and destiny for us.

      there is this beautiful, vibrant, healthy, and yup “glowing”, ME, that i feel inside of myself so strongly and passionately, the ME i know i am meant to be, but my physical being is not one bit of any kind of reflection of that version of myself. Maria shared in a comment something to the sort of how our current physical state is really mostly been manifested from energies that aren’t us anyways, but more external energies like our ancestry, and when i read that i was like yes!! that’s so what i feel! i feel like everything from the physical diseases i’m struggling through, down to the way my physical appearance has manifested, is this crazy awkward mix of all kinds of things that aren’t ME. like this physical being my soul is in is a mix of the challenges and diseases and dysfunctions and insecurities of everyone and everything i’ve carried weight for, and somewhere underneath all those layers of external messy mess i’ve taken on, the real ME is just waiting break through and shine.

      gosh yes Maria, thank u so much for this place to share, so much comfort here ❤ ❤ ❤

      • Beautifully said sweet pea. And I’ll add to your wisdom that we advanced souls going through embodied enlightenment knew ahead of time that this is the lifetime. Of total integration. Caterpllar to butterfly. So recalibrating the body was part of the plan. But the tricky part now is to not identify with the energies coming up. Because when we do it interferes with this natural process. And the good news is we are identifying less and less with those energies. So the detachment we feel is a good thing for us right now.
        And yes it’s nice to have the support and comfort of each other during these intense time. Thanks to all of you here and love to all.❤️❤️❤️

      • Sweet pea–
        I’m hugging you back!!!
        You have just articulated it all perfectly! I struggle to describe it in a way that doesnt make me sound appearance obsessed–its really not about vanity at ALL–but who i feel myself to be on the deepest level, and its so hard sometimes with this particular physicalness (the way you describe it as an amalgamation of energies not our own is PERFECT!) is so disconcerting sometimes that i literally feel like some sort of fraud, wearing a costume that the zipper is stuck on & i cant get out of!! This is NOT who i really am & sometimes i just want to shout it to others. This is not the real me. To be clear who i really am is not some eternally youthful supermodel (who always takes fab ID photos LOL) with a perfect figure blah blah blah, but simply the very best, healthiest, GLOWING-est version of my physicality, and a lightness, a comfortability with being here & a palpable enjoyment of life–a calm sort of enthusiasm & unshakability, and almost always a bit of a smile–the kind where others think you have a delicious secret. This heavy, pale, tired, old looking person with too many pains & health issues with the crypt-keeper hair–is not me!! And feeling stiff, and unwell, moving around with such effort and pain–the real me is agile and light on my feet and comfortable in my body, moving easily and fluidly instead of lumbering & efforting. And your words, “…homesickness for who we really are”– is EXACTLY IT. I even use that word constantly, “homesickness” in a number of ways to describe (mostly to myself) how i feel!
        “…but i feel like some of us are so unshakably hellbent in the desire for the physical health, vibrancy, beauty, wholeness stuff, because manifesting what we ache for in those places has incredible purpose and destiny for us.”

        “….everyone & everything i’ve carried weight for….”

        Thank you for this articulation, and for just understanding–and i totally understand you right back–it really makes all the difference in finding a softer, kinder focus for the time being, of being able to relax and allow (& have chocolate!) like Maria said. I so appreciate you sharing this! ☺️💕☺️💕☺️💕

  8. Yes Maria!!! Caterpillar to butterfly! That metaphor has had deep, DEEP resonance for me starting many many years ago. This is one long-ass pupal stage!!! LOL. But caterpillar must dissolve before butterfly can manifest….

  9. yup Elila i feel all of what you share so perfectly! this is EXACTLY it…

    “…wearing a costume that the zipper is stuck on & i cant get out of!!…”

    and yes it’s not wanting to fit into any kinda mold, it’s a craving to physically embody the most beautiful, vibrant, healthy energy of my own unique spirit… the very thought of that is perfect freedom, and living separate from it honestly close to torture. and it’s not lack of gratitude for what this physical body has carried me through, it’s just that there truly is no way to ignore or go around that ache for that genuine wholeness of body and spirit in one. i totally hear you ❤ and it does feel so so good to honor those feelings without judging ourselves for it huh?

    and Maria what you say is so so important for me to keep on remindin' my weary heart about… that the things our bodies are going through are an on purpose part of our spiritual transformation. i have to keep that in mind all the time or i can get so lost in comparison and judgment of my unique process… that whole mess of "why is no one else experiencing these crazy ailments"?, why aren't other people's bodies changing in these confusing ways??" …cause this is my caterpillar phase, and butterfly me is in the works 🙂 ❤

    • Wow!!! Sweet pea–you DO totally get what im trying to say!!!

      “… it’s a craving to physically embody the most beautiful, vibrant, healthy energy of my own unique spirit… the very thought of that is perfect freedom, and living separate from it honestly close to torture. and it’s not lack of gratitude for what this physical body has carried me through, it’s just that there truly is no way to ignore or go around that ache for that genuine wholeness of body and spirit in one. ”
      This is soooooo perfectly stated–its EXACTLY what i mean, what im talking about. I have such a huge smile right now! Its always such a gift when someone completely comprehends what another is attempting to express. Thank you so much for taking the time to write it out–its given me more clarity and is so comforting. Sending you lots of understanding and appreciation!! 💙💙💙

  10. Aaaaaaaaaa-MEN sister! I’m with you all the way! 🐛💚🐛💚🐛

    I hope this is ok (if not i understand–i swear i won’t make a habit of it!)
    For an entirely apropos chuckle, check out this little cartoon pic that a friend sent to me:

  11. Beautifully put thanks Maria

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